The Perfect Run

Enrique Manada had been true to his word.

Sitting around a garish pink table at the Dostoïevski restaurant, Ryan, Len, and the Panda examined the plans of Dynamis’ Gravity Gun; though the Gravity Rifle would have been a better name for it. The device was long and impractical, though the courier was certain they could miniaturize it.

As Livia had promised, the Dostoïevski was a Russian all-you-can-eat buffet located at New Rome’s periphery and catering almost exclusively to families. The restaurant could have easily accommodated hundreds of patrons, though Ryan’s girlfriend had rented the entire restaurant for a private gathering. The floor was carpeted with industrial, blue flooring, with the food steam trays decorated with fish imagery; staff members were dressed in sailor’s attire, and the tables smelled of ice cream. Somehow, the comforting atmosphere put even the usually shy Len at ease.

Everyone had come dressed casually for the occasion, even Ryan. The other guests hadn’t arrived yet, though the courier didn’t doubt they would. Nobody in their right mind would miss the garish neon lights advertising the restaurant on the roof.

“A few seconds after being fired, the projectile creates a gravitational anomaly,” Timmy explained, after reviewing the schematics. It was so odd to see him without his costume on in human form. He looked so scrawny and ordinary, with a shy, gentle smile. “Everything in its vicinity is pulled towards the sphere, while it counteracts the Earth’s pull.”

“So, if I understand correctly, and I almost always do,” Ryan said, “the sphere will pull Lightning Butt towards itself, and then fly up?”

His pandawan nodded. “According to Dynamis’ calculations, the Gravity Gun will expel him from the upper atmosphere. After that, the sphere will wander through the solar system without ever returning home.”

Ryan immediately saw where Dynamis found the inspiration for that plan. “They wanted to Kars Augustus.”

“Kars?” Len asked with a frown. Ryan silently vowed to remedy her complete absence of pop culture knowledge.

“I understood that reference!” The Panda said happily.

“Every time you open your mouth, my young pandawan, my faith in humanity is renewed,” his mentor congratulated him.

“But will it work?” Len asked with skepticism. “Augustus can fly.”

“By manipulating electric charges to ionize air,” Ryan pointed out. “He shouldn’t be able to fly outside the atmosphere. However, if he breaks the sphere before reaching space...”

Len frowned. “Do you think it could work, Riri?”

“Livia doesn’t believe so.” At least not without support. “Well, it’s not like I’m going to rely on only one secret weapon.” His main plan was to lure Lightning Butt to Monaco and trap him there permanently, while beating him up into submission with his Black Flux power remained a secondary option.

“We could make copies and distribute them to our group,” Len suggested. “I could replace my water rifle with it.”

“No, too dangerous,” Ryan said. “For it to work, I will need to fire it in close combat. Better to use our limited time on miniaturizing this Gravity Gun and install it in my armor.”

“Only your armor?” Shortie’s eyes widened. “Riri, you can’t mean…”

“Dynamis’ gardener in chief had a point. When people dare the lightning to strike them, they die.” Ryan had seen Augustus tear apart Big Adam’s jaw with a backhand, shatter Sunshine’s core, and survive the following supernova. New Rome’s tyrant was, by far, the most powerful foe the courier had ever faced. There was no room for error with him. “I’ll take Mob Zeus on alone.”

“Sifu, no!” The Panda protested in panic. “That’s suicide!”

“He’s right, Riri,” Len added while folding the schematics. “I’m coming with you.”

“I’m the only one who can even harm him,” Ryan replied. “And his immunity to my time-stop means I’ll have a hard time saving anyone caught in the crossfire. If he kills me, I can come back from it.”

Hopefully.

Len looked ready to protest, when the restaurant’s door slammed open and a green-haired spitfire walked into the place. “Holà!” the young woman said in mangled Spanish, before switching back to Italian. She dressed so trashily that Ryan almost missed the hazmat suit. “What’s up, boys and girls?”

“Hey, Bianca!” Ryan welcomed her with a raised hand. “What will you start with? Caviar? Blinis? Borscht?”

“I’ll try everything, El Presidente,” the former Sarin snickered, as a blonde, shy woman and a scrawny man followed her. A giant more than two meters tall closed the march, though he struggled to fit through the restaurant’s doors. “I’ve got years of sensory deprivation to make up for.”

“Hello…” The former Acid Rain smiled shyly at Ryan’s group. The contrast with her deranged former self couldn’t be starker.

“Oh, hi Helen!” The Panda waved a hand at them. “Hi, Mongrel!”

“Not Mongrel,” the latter replied. With his Knockoff Elixirs out of his system, the former Psycho looked healthy and most importantly, sane again. “It’s Jerome now. I don’t wanna have a supervillain nickname ever again.”

“You should still pick one,” Ryan said. “We’ll need you to improve our cure, and maybe even help us with weapons in hand.”

The former Mongrel shrugged. “Look, I owe you guys a life debt, and I’ll pay it back. But once it’s done, I never want to have anything to do with Elixirs or fight for the rest of my life. Years as a savage animal make you appreciate a normal nine-to-five existence like nothing else.”

“You… you freed me from a long nightmare. Cured me, and gave me my life back.” Helen bowed to Ryan deeply. “If I can do anything to help… I will do it. Even if it means picking up arms again.”

“Yeah, none of us are finks here,” Bianca said. “Even Frank feels he owes you one… that, and he’s eager to burn down the establishment.”

Ryan glanced at the last member of the group as he walked inside the restaurant. Though he was no longer the colossus he had once been, the man was still over two meters tall, and slightly balding. His middle-aged face reminded Ryan of Marshal Zhukov, tough and blunt, but also someone you could have a good time fishing with. His grey parka and heavy boots made him look for a soldier ready to go to war.

“My name is not Frank,” the giant replied with a heavy Russian accent. “My name is Vladimir. Or Vlad, like the impaler.”

“Whatever you say,” Bianca replied, before moving on to the buffet. Helen hurriedly followed after her, while Jerome asked the waiters about the nearest toilets. “I never knew I would say that, but I liked you more as an American.”

Ryan agreed. Frank had been a true patriot, enthusiastic, loyal, amusing… while his real self...

“It was capitalist brainwashing,” Vlad the Mad replied. “They know they cannot stop the revolution, so they infect the workers’ minds with microchips and polluted ideas.”

His real self was a total killjoy.

Worse, Len immediately recognized a kindred spirit. “Are you a Marxist-Leninist?” she asked hopefully.

Vlad the Mad’s eyes lit up in enthusiasm, and he immediately sat right next to Shortie. Thankfully, the tables were meant for six and could accommodate the giant just fine. “I am a Trotskyist,” he said with pride. “Only through permanent revolution can the workers of the world achieve equality for all!”

“I thought the communists were almost extinct?” Timmy asked naively.

“No, you would fit right in,” Ryan said. “But only in Panda form.”

“You think equality is something to joke about?” Vlad squinted at Ryan. “You think neoliberal oppression is funny?”

everything seriously, and didn’t have a humorous bone in his body. “No,

may be dead, but his ideas live on,” Vlad the

would rather like it the other way around, but Len was so overjoyed to meet another commie that she started grilling him about political theory. “Do you think universal equality can still be achieved in a neo-capitalist world like this

Helen teleported his empty plate and replaced it with one full of beef. With the Psycho treatment having separated her two powers, the former Acid Rain could switch the position of items of near-equivalent mass, including herself. “The

in no time. He wondered if he had created a monster. “I prefer social democracy,” the Panda tried to

subtlety. “And that is why this

valuable time!” Alchemo complained crankily as he

matters, but the company,” the Doll

wasted no time bothering Helen and Bianca. The toaster on wheels rolled all the way to the buffet, to Acid Rain’s confusion. “Hey, beauties, do you want your blinis

Helen asked Bianca, who shrugged before buttering

the best for last. Mathias walked into the restaurant with his dazzlingly golden girlfriend holding his arm, while Livia and Felix exchanged words behind them. Ryan observed his girlfriend

when

glancing at Fortuna. “Do

one arm around her boyfriend’s, and another around her brother’s. “These gentlemen will

do for family,” Felix grumbled, though his

anticipating a bit too much on that

gaze, before

window. Their table was meant for two and isolated from the rest, and provided a cozy kind

of Castamere?” Ryan asked, upon

vigilante. Though Mathias sat with his girlfriend and Felix, he often glanced at Ryan’s

a cruel, wicked woman,” the courier

I disguise myself as a hockey killer and ambush him?” She asked, as a waiter gave them a glass

made him pay for his slight against me tenfold already,” Ryan replied while sipping his

Ryan’s was the most dashing of the lot, though his girlfriend’s Ferrari gave the Plymouth

Dr. Stitch, and he chose to work on the Bloodstream vaccine plague rather than join us,” Ryan said. “Sunshine and co are destroying

their presence in the city, it

are things going on

he hasn’t heard of their activities in a few days, right as Geist

“So far?”

unharmed. My father hasn’t been informed yet, but once he is, he

patch up with an old friend,” Ryan replied with a sigh. “I owed that

smiled, and for once the courier didn’t detect any hint of jealousy in his girlfriend’s

his advice, but it took

a fifty-fifty percent chance to take Wyvern on her olive branch, and I will make sure to warn her if my father issues a kill order. She will make

said. His fingers brushed softly against Livia’s, to her joy. “Is it alright to come here

Meta-Gang.” She winked at him. “Dad is too happy that I am taking my future role of leader seriously

it, I should have asked to be paid in advance,”

and this time they will examine the area thoroughly.”

had expected as much. “Take what we

Bahamut orbital laser and robot

“I considered offering Dynamis the necessary technology, but not until after

“Unless?”

putting

all goes well for us, my father will be ousted from power, as will Hector and Alphonse Manada. At which point, both my family’s empire and

raised an eyebrow. “You want

Livia said with a foxy grin. “How does

chuckled. “I think it’s already

world, not the new,” Livia defended her choice. “And you’re going

“Moi?”

She laughed at his confusion. “You always joked about becoming a president. Don’t you

while finishing his Vodka. “When did

said before giving him a dirty gaze. “You’ll look good with

you wear

could help this newborn nation, or it might create more tensions in Europe. I’ll

expression deflated. “If

remember everything. We can try again.” She expected to say something, but grew suspicious when he remained silent. “Ryan,

courier sighed. “I’m having performance

eyes

maybe the Violet Ultimate One itself, won’t let me. I

timelines?” Livia took his hands into her own,

how his power’s inner workings, and how

said with a sad frown. “What did you ask for to get a power like

“I

wanted to die, past tense,”

Sharp.

managed to make Alchemo relax a bit,

said, her gaze lingering on the former Psychos among them. “In some cases, you saved their lives,

most of

it weren’t for its influence, we wouldn’t have met each other. If

at her heart. “But if everything you destroy with that power stays destroyed…”

won’t,” Ryan said. “I swear. I might imprison

him carefully, before nodding to herself.

“That’s all?”

trust you, my prince. It’s as simple as that. You always fulfilled your promises, and I know you will follow through with that one.” Her

no intention of saving Lightning Butt from himself. “Or I might

had already made peace with the fact her father's days were

done,” she admitted. “Ordering his victims to help cure him would be greedy. Bruno Costa could have saved him, and he blew that chance anyway. Now,

defenders can we

“Aunt Pluto and the Killer Seven have orders

of these people needed to go for the Augusti to reform,