• Chapter 10

  • Chapter 10

  • Perhaps it was because he first shared his family stories so openly that I found it easier to speak.

  • Hesitating, I said,

  • “My mom passed away, and my dad, like yours, cut ties with me.”

  • That year, at my mom’s funeral, a sea of people came, all dressed in black.

  • The master of ceremonies gave a long eulogy, but I couldn’t fully understand it. My mind wandered midway.

  • I remember looking at my mom’s photo, where she seemed to smile at me, and I smiled back.

  • The next second, I was slapped to the ground by my father.

  • He roared, “Your mom’s dead! How can you still smile?”

  • Everyone turned to look at me as if I were some kind of monster.

  • In that moment, I was terrified.

  • Tears welled in my eyes, but I bit my lips and didn’t dare make a sound.

  • In the first year after my mom’s passing, my dad often sat in the living room at night, flipping through her letters and photos.

  • By the second year, he had packed her belongings into a few boxes and pushed them into a dusty

  • corner.

  • By the third year, he had remarried.

  • The new stepmom dumped the boxes into the yard, saying she wanted to burn them all.

  • I desperately rummaged through the pile and saved the camera, holding it tightly to my chest.

  • I burned myself in the process.

  • 09:23

  • Chapter 10

  • From then on, the camera became the only thing left of my mom.

  • Later, my younger sister was born.

  • The love and attention of the whole family shifted to her.

  • I grew up as if invisible, turning eighteen without anyone noticing.

  • to college

  • enrollment, my dad handed me a thick stack of

  • now.

  • counted it–30,000

  • severed the blood ties between us.

  • and classmates praised me for

  • stay calm no matter

  • started working, this became my professional strength.

  • but only I knew–I was too

  • ང་ད

  • on the day of the funeral, I hadn’t angered

  • still have

  • years, I’ve grown used to suppressing my

  • if I ever laughed freely again or

  • lose something even more

  • I let

  • so long, had never been shared with

  • 09:23

  • Bride of

  • 54.9%

  • Chapter 10

  • furrowed deeply. The usual faint smile at the corners

  • tone was unusually

  • have you forgotten? You were only five years old

  • little puzzled. “What?”

  • laughing are a child’s

  • no one ever let you be

  • it struck me like a

  • the funeral, my dad stopped speaking to me for a long time.

  • my sister was born, my needs

  • my studies and

  • wasn’t a single moment when I had been cared for as

  • I understood that my tears and

  • was better to bury them

  • I said

  • but I’m an adult now. It’s impossible to

  • want to laugh, or cry when I want to cry…”

  • I finished speaking, a sudden jolt ran through my ribs, like a mild electric

  • let out a strange yelp

  • was Joseph poking my side.

  • smile, he said,

  • dodge, but

  • 09:23

  • 0%

  • of

  • Chapter 10

  • was as if there was a switch on my waist–I couldn’t stop laughing, no matter how hard

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