• Chapter 14

  • When I woke up, the faint scent of antiseptic lingered in the air.

  • I had been transferred to a hospital back home.

  • The doctor told me I had spent two full weeks in the ICU.

  • My internal organs were severely injured, and I had taken a bullet to the shoulder.

  • But by some stroke of luck,

  • my spleen wasn’t ruptured, and the bullet hadn’t caused an exit wound.

  • The blood loss wasn’t severe, and that’s how I managed to survive until the peacekeepers rescued

  • me.

  • I knew clearly in my heart–it was because Joseph shielded me twice.

  • He saved my life.

  • I reached out to everyone I could, trying to find any trace of him.

  • But they all said the chaos at the time made it impossible to recover Joseph’s body.

  • With casualties mounting, Doctors Without Borders had suspended its projects in North Kivu.

  • I had no chance to go back and look for him.

  • Just like that, Joseph vanished.

  • Every night, I woke up screaming, gripped by terror.

  • His dying moments replayed endlessly in my mind, refusing to fade.

  • The doctor diagnosed me with PTSD.

  • I began taking medication, attending therapy sessions, even resorting to alcohol.

  • 09:24

  • of

  • 58.1%

  • Chapter 14

  • But nothing worked.

  • urged me to try starting anew, to stop dwelling on the past.

  • how could

  • for

  • became an unshakable shadow, always hanging

  • me hate myself for still being alive, hate that it wasn’t me who died,

  • not granting him

  • the edge of a rooftop, wanting to follow him.

  • at the very last moment, I would pull myself back.

  • was one Joseph gave everything

  • the right to abandon

  • I returned to work after my leave.

  • no longer face cameras or photographs.

  • ended up requesting a transfer to a

  • I remained a walking corpse,

  • it anymore and encouraged me

  • me to a

  • had no interest and only wanted to say a few

  • I

  • I saw

  • identical to Joseph’s–I

  • 09:24

  • Bride of Velvet

  • 58.3%

  • Chapter 14

  • of strength I had not to break down in tears right there.

  • found out he was the brother Joseph had once

  • first, treating him as a stand–in did bring

  • were so wonderfully

  • would cook dinner and wait

  • days off, we’d curl up on the

  • nightmares woke me in terror,

  • quietly beside me would let

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