The silent baby.
(Anna)
“It will happen.” Eliza tells me as she lifts a crying Thomas from my arms. He won’t feed from me; I just can’t seem to get him to latch. It swear if one more person tells me it’s perfectly normal. I might start getting stabby. I watch with resentment as Eliza puts a bottle to Thoma s’s mouth and he starts suckling like he’s being starved.
“There is something wrong with me.” I wipe at the tears rolling down. my face as Eliza sits on the end of the hospital bed.
“No there isn’t. You just need practice: I’ve seen loads of females go through this.” Eliza tells me as she starts to rock Thomas gently from side to side, she’s barely moving but I can see his eyes starting to close.
“How do you know how to do that?” I ask her, amazed.
“I’m part of a big family and an even bigger pack. You pick up a trick or two surrounded by all those females.” This is the first time Eliza has mentioned her family to me or her pack, she’s so closed off after everything my brother did to her. “I think Fraction will be back soon, he ran out of here shouting something about babies needing blankets.” I laugh at Eliza’s words.
“It’s been a shock to the system for both of us. Neither of us got to truly enjoy the pregnancy before Thomas was here. No one taught me how to do this, what if I destroy him? What if he grows up to be a giant ball of anxiety like me?” I whisper my fears into my lap knowing Eliza heard me.
“Are you planning on going somewhere?” I shake my head at her with
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wide eyes, “then you have all the help you need. Venture out of that pack house and I bet there is a horde of females dying to help the new Luna.” I smile at her words.
“Are you staying?” I have wanted to ask for a while, but I didn’t know how to broach the topic. Eliza sighs, handing Thomas back to me.
“I don’t know. Did Rick tell you he’s, my mate?” I shake my head no: I sort of knew but I’ve been in my own head a lot lately. “He wants me to stay here but honestly I can’t see ever wanting a man to touch me again.”
“I get that. As much as I adore Fraction, the mere thought of his touch sent me into a panic when I got back. I can only imagine what it’s like for you having been there for so long.” I tell Eliza trying to show her I understand her feelings.

“How did you get past it?” She asks me in a small voice.
“I will let you know when I do.” I give her a small smile, “one day at a time.”
“Sound advice if you ask me.” Momma Beth says from the doorway, “sorry ladies I couldn’t wait any longer.” She strolls confidently over to the side of the bed and holds her hands out. Gently, so I don’t wake Thomas, I hand him over. “Ooooo come to mama.”
“Mama?” I ask her with a little giggle.
“My right to choose until he can talk. Oh, what a beauty.” The love shining off Momma Beth’s face is addictive; I can’t help but smile along with her.
“He won’t feed Momma.” Momma Beth looks up at me with sad eyes.
“He’s not latching?” She asks me in a soft voice. I shake my head no.
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I told her 11
парреп.
says
bed.
“I agree. When he is ready, he will, just remember babies can feel what we are feeling. So, if you are anxious and worried, he will feel it.” Momma Beth says as she looks down at Thomas. “He looks well so he’s not starving. Bottles will do him no harm even if it’s for the long term.”
“You sure?” I’m worried that all the baby books say breasts are best.
“Fraction was bottle fed; he wouldn’t latch. And he has grown into a perfectly fine man, don’t believe everything you read. Babies can’t be scripted Anna. Just follow your gut and you can’t go wrong. You might think you can’t do this but trust me, you can.” I smile at her: Momma Beth has a knack for offering great advice just when you need it most.
“I think we should like them to get some sleep, it’s been a long day. Eliza says to us both. Momma Beth nods and places Thomas next to
me.
“Thanks guys.” I whisper as they walk out of the room, closing the door behind them.
I watch as Thomas pumps his little fists into the air and then settles into a peaceful sleep. He looks so soft, and I can’t help but think I am going to mess him up somehow, it’s not like I have a strong parental guide to work on. I suppose Fraction will have to take the lead on this. one. It’s then that I realise Fraction has been gone most of the day, just as I am about to reach out to him over the bond the door opens, and he walks into the room.
“Sorry Little Wolf.” I went to get this. Fraction comes over to Thomas and carefully lays a baby blue blanket over Thoma s’s lower half.
“What’s this?” I reach out touching the blanket, I thought it would be
The silent baby
208 Vouchers
rough and scratchy but it’s actually soft like a feather.
“It was my baby blanket.” Fraction smiles down at Thomas. I watch as he walks around the bed and climbs on behind me. “Ready for a nap, Little Wolf?” I nod my head as I feel my eyes closing, leaning my head back into his chest I let his heartbeat settle me into sleep.
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