Chapter 200: Chapter 200: Losing Control

Serena’s POV~

​Lucian froze, a sound...half-gasp, half-sob...caught in his throat. His lips were cold and trembling against mine for only a split second before the shock burned away, replaced by something fierce and hungry.

The desperation I had seen simmering in his eyes erupted, and he didn’t just respond; he devoured the moment.

​His arms instantly locked around my waist, tightening with a crushing force that lifted me slightly off my feet and pressed our bodies together against the cold wall.

It was a kiss fueled not by gentleness or tenderness, but by pain, fury, years of crushing absence, and undeniable longing.

​It was a confession.

​The single wall of control Lucian had desperately held up during the entire dinner...the polite smiles, the cold indifference...shattered entirely.

He tilted my head, deepening the contact, pouring all his raw, choked-back misery and longing into the desperate contact.

I felt the wetness of his tears still clinging to his skin, mingling with the frantic urgency of his mouth against mine.

​My own resistance, that stubborn wall of self-preservation I had built over the years, cracked wide open.

I clung to him, not to push him away, but to anchor myself to the only thing in this suffocating palace that felt remotely real.

My fingers left his shirt and tangled in the thick silk of his hair, pulling him closer still, trying to melt the inches between us, trying to find the boy I knew beneath the veneer of the cold man.

​The darkness of the small room, the rough texture of the wall behind me, the suffocating sound of our combined, ragged breathing...it all faded into background noise.

There was only the fire of his touch, the taste of salt and desperation on his lips, and the thrumming, agonizing realization that every lie, every distance, every deliberate cold word spoken over the last few years had been for nothing.

We were exactly where we had always been: lost in each other’s orbit, incapable of escaping.

​He shifted, his hands moving from my waist up my spine, pulling the delicate fabric of my gown tighter, seeking purchase, seeking me.

He pressed his forehead against mine for a breathless moment, a sound of profound relief rumbling low in his chest before his lips found mine again, softer this time, a quiet, almost pleading inquiry that immediately gave way to another consuming rush of passion.

secret shared only between us and the shadows.

finally broke, leaving us both gasping for air in the silent, suffocating

loosened, but his head remained nestled against my

him anymore. My hands, which had been clutching his hair, drifted down to cup his face again, my thumbs gently tracing the path of the tears

could see his hazy, dark eyes in the gloom. I leaned in, placing soft, reverent

his temple, the words barely a breath. "Just give me a little time...

left my lips...the first true, selfless promise I’d

tension in his body snapped. He didn’t cry louder; he simply melted, his whole frame slumping

terrifyingly so, just the broken boy who had believed every

his hands burying themselves in my hair,

frantic series of punishing, worshipping kisses. He kissed my jawline, my cheekbones,

my neck, where the tight collar of the gown choked me. His

he made vibrated against my skin, sending a violent shudder through

slipped from my hair

fumbled with the tiny mechanism, the sound muffled by the thick fabric of the dress and the racing pulse

electric sound that felt deafening

mouth moved lower, descending past my collarbone and onto the newly

his intention clear. I couldn’t form a coherent thought, only a

the suffocating tension of the entire evening finally found a desperate, consuming release

tug of the undone zipper was

his body tense...not with passion, but

that wasn’t fully human, and then, I felt it: a needle-sharp pressure where his mouth

The touch was agonizingly tender, yet undeniably threatening. As he moved his head, two points of white, involuntary heat briefly

moan escaped

sound was his breaking

that had been blazing in his eyes

spot on my neck, his lips slightly parted, showing the faint, immediate retraction of

He had lost

once, heavily, as he swallowed the primal, feral urges that had just consumed him.

to the wall in a

cursed himself in a low, vicious whisper, something sharp and unintelligible

face, flushed and vulnerable, still leaning back against the cold wall, my

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