Chapter 80

“Merikh

I stalk into the wet sand, my feet sinking with every heavy step as the rain pelts down on my back and shoulders. This beach would have been a wonderful place to take my hybrid queen. The perfect place where the forest meets the sea, the scent of pine and fresh salty air swirling together in a melody of our tale.

Except now it’s a place of ache and sorrow. There is a part of me that still expects to see her emerge from the water and walk up to me with a seductive smile. I focus on the waves, begging her to arise and tell me this has all been a terrible joke. A useless dream for a man who found his dead gamma, but a dream I can’t stop having,

I pause when I get to the tumultuous water, lapping angrily at the edge of the shore as the storm rages. A mirror image of the emotions tearing through me. A dangerous mix of guilt and anger growing out of control, taking out anything that dares enter its warring path.

“Merikh, you should be waiting in the car. It is safer.” Hayes says, rushing up behind me. But his concerns fall on deaf ears.

Speaking of safety, when my heart is out there exposed, being exploited. How can I possibly care about safety when hers is the only concern I have? If I had been more concerned about her, more receptive to her needs and desires, then maybe, just maybe, none of this would have happened. I held on to her too tight, and I lost her.

“We don’t have time to waste waiting for Caspian to make his way to us.” I remind my brother who sighs. “Every second she is gone, I come a second closer to losing my damn mind, Hayes

Jdrag my hands through my hair, slicking it back with the wetness of the rain.

“We will find her, Merikh.” He says, his voice firm. No room for a lie. Hayes truly believes we will get our Luna back.

“That’s not what worries me, brother.” I sigh heavily, watching the waves crash into each other, growing taller as they white cap and swell, rushing toward the shore.

“Use me.” A voice says from behind us. Hayes‘ body goes stiff and we turn to see Landra standing there. The rain grows stronger, the downpour deafening in the ears with the rage of the sea, so she moves closer. Her eyes dart from Hayes to mine. “Use me to find her.”

“I don’t understand.” I furrow my brows, confused.

“You swore you don’t remember anything.” Hayes says, sounding frustrated and accusatory. She ignores his tone and looks directly at me.

“I don’t recall anything and I can’t shift, but what if you command me to shift? What if my lycan knows things?” She says, taking a step closer.

“You can’t question a lycan.” Hayes scoffs, a laugh rumbling through him as thunder cracks through the sky, lightning following it and crashing to the beach to our far right.

I don’t blink, instead; I get lost in thought.

can’t I?” I ask no one in

Hayes scoffs. “Because Lycan can’t form coherent sentences.”

and he throws his hands up

question her. She is here, in my mind, but there’s a barrier, a lack of trust, but if she recognizes you as her alpha, as the king

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you. Maybe she will allow you to share what

“You aren’t a member of a pack, so he can’t command you. And since we aren’t in our pack.

cheeks growing pink. “Unless we accept

strikes no less than three feet away from him and he doesn’t even flinch. His eyes bore into her and then I

determination to heart break. I can sense the tears she is shedding the rain washing

on the water as I watch the clouds grow even dark. Another flash of lightning lighting up the water to see a figure fast approaching. I prepare myself, waiting as someone rises from the water, scaly and dark before it shakes its head and Caspian saunters out toward me.

hair

car,” he shouts above

didn’t want to waste any time.” I tell

the sky. “Then let’s move. I have lots to

thick canopy of trees; I grab the bag of clothing for him and toss it his way. In silence, he grabs the towel, drying himself off as I move to the car and climb into the passenger’s seat. Leandra sits behind the

right, though. If Hayes and her accept each other, it tethers her to our pack, which means she follows my orders. But that

love Colette. She is my life, my soul, but I can not force Hayes to accept her. It has to be his own decision, not mine, If I get desperate enough, I may force the issue. I know myself just as well as he knows me. Which does nothing to make me feel like it is less

to discuss.” I say

out the window as

Caspian says without hesitation. “But after discussing matters with the vampires, they have chosen to remove themselves from

who is lost in thought as he pulls down

ask and he nods.

They are choosing to

“Naturally.” Hayes grumbles.

remind him. “And they sure as shit weren’t going to be on our side if they

suppose.”

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