Untouchable by Marii Solaria

Chapter 21 The Decisions

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“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.“–Roy T. Bennett

Halima

I’m now laying in my bed, looking up at the ceiling. Nightfall had made its appearance, immersing the territory in darkness. Up above, the half–moon and its twinkling stars serve as our only illumination. The distant chatter of wolves and their late–night rendezvous echoed in my eardrums, but I didn’t pay attention to it. My mind’s stuck on my therapy session today with Mayra.

1 spilled everything from my fears to my desires. It took me two months to get used to speaking to a stranger due to fear and judgment. But Mayra had been nothing but open and warm, allowing me to gradually come out of my shell. Just like the others, she, too, recommended that I make my decision on whether to attend the ceremony. That’s the power I have over the situation, and no one would judge me for it. The entire time, she reassured me I was not a walking disaster warning, if anything goes astray, I shouldn’t take the blame for it.

I roll on my side, resting my arm under my pillow. Why was this so hard? It feels like two strings were pulling me, one to the light and the other to darkness. Sometimes, the pull into the darkness was stronger. It was seductive, cloaking me in a blanket, leading me to believe I was better off dead. But in others, the light was stronger. The light was warm, but also foreign. It was something I’ve never felt before, and it was scary–but now I have people around me pushing me forward to heal.

But It’s a battle where I feel unequipped to fight.

“Are you going to go to the ceremony?” Artemis spoke through our mind–link. It was always nice to hear her voice, she helped to fight the demons in my mind since we’re both in this together.

“I want to,” I answer back, shutting my eyes to envision my beautiful wolf. Big and majestic as ever, I needed to let her out once I’m okay, “I’m scared. My mind is coming up with all these scenarios that could go wrong if I show up.”

“I know. I can see them, and they aren’t pretty.” Artemis trotted closer to me, sitting on her hind end. “I, too, wish things were easier. But, just as Mayra said, we’re dealing with many traumatic experiences, so our brain is wired differently. We expect the worst in everything and hide, hoping things go right.”

face the problem,” I admit with a self–deprecating sigh. “I want to be strong. Artemis. I’m so sick and tired of being weak and scared of my shadow. I look around and see all these powerful wolves, happy

is our responsibility is when and how we get back up. Fighting is hard. You said so yourself. But no one ever said that recovery is easy. It’s a long, hard, and treacherous journey. But…I think it’s worth

of Artemis’s words. “Since when did

on a few things during your sessions.” Artemis shrugged. “It’s a process, Halima. Taking back the power that has been stolen

1/3

Her words lit a deep fire within me I didn’t know was there. I rather–no, want to live in the light. Not sust that, I want to live here. I want to stay in this pack, they welcomed

a broken girl and nursed ber back to full health. How often does one

decision, or rather, decisions.

my

shopping tomorrow? I want

seconds. “I got a couple of styles in mind that would

you then. Goodnight

red nightgown. Shutting off the lights, it bathes my room in comfortable darkness. Crawling underneath the covers,

correctly? You want to join the

was a small smile on her face, and she

no longer had the feeding tube. I feel relieved, it was all in the progress

without jeopardizing her safety. I was betting

girl sitting on the other side of my desk. The inkling in the back of my mind told me the would accept the offer, though I didn’t expect it to be

well,” I folded my hands on my desk. “You will go through a bonding ritual that ties you to the pack. You will have the Pack Mark branded on you as opposed to having

eyes widened in fear. “H–How would I get the Pack Mark?”

I’ve done hundreds of bindings since I became Alpha. It

She answered with an anxious laugh, running her hand through her tight curls. “Um. When will the ritual