When Her "Death" Couldn't Break Him (Cecilia and Nathaniel)

Chapter 18

Richard's POV.

It had been two weeks since I got engaged to Susan, and she was on top of the world.

Everywhere we went, she flashed the ring, her smile wide and bright. At home, she took charge of everything. "We need new curtains," she said one day. The next, it was, "Let's change the dining table. It's too old-fashioned." She wanted to make the house feel 'new,' like a fresh start.

I didn't care much. She could change whatever she wanted. It was her home too now.

But as the days passed, doubts started creeping in, like shadows I couldn't quite shake off.

I remembered what Martins had said. He had looked me in the eyes and asked, 'Are you sure you're happy?'

At the time, I brushed it off. What did he know? I knew what I wanted. I wanted Susan.

I wanted the thrill and the spark, not the dullness I had with...

I paused, trying not to let my mind finish the thought. But it was there.

Sarah.

For all the things I didn't feel for her, she put effort into our marriage. She planned everything-events, dinners, even simple things like managing our household.

She was always involved, making sure everything ran smoothly. There was a structure, a routine that I relied on without even knowing it.

Now, with her gone, things felt... chaotic. I couldn't find my shoes half the time because they weren't where they used to be.

My schedule was a mess because Susan kept filling it with things I didn't even know about until the last minute.

"Richard, have you seen the paint samples?" Susan's voice cut through my thoughts.

She walked into the room, holding a fan of colors. "I'm thinking we should repaint the living room. Make it feel more 'us'. What do you think? Blue, beige, maybe a soft green?" I stared at the colors in her hand, feeling strangely lost. "I don't know, Susan. You pick."

She frowned slightly. "I want us to decide together. It's our home now."

sure," I muttered, trying to sound enthusiastic.

left the room, already talking to herself about rugs and lamps and God knows what else. I let out a sigh, rubbing my

at the corner where Sarah's old vase used to sit. It was gone now, replaced

to me, even with the

even

could still hear Martin's voice in the back of my mind again. "Are

breath, trying to convince myself. I made my

wanted Susan, not Sarah. Never

then, why did it feel like something

what I had always wanted. She was independent, and confident, and knew what she

didn't need

used to think that was perfect. With Susan, things were simple-at least, they were

days went on, I found myself noticing the small things.

barely glanced up from her phone or whatever she was doing. "Kate would

wasn't a big deal. I didn't expect her to drop everything for

used to ask. She'd see the look on my face and say, "Tough day?" Even though,

make sure there was a warm meal, maybe even something

it, but it was there-those small, unnoticed ways

I needed that. Now, I wasn't so

I had spent hours in meetings, and all

dropped my briefcase by the door and walked into the living room. Susan was sitting on the couch, scrolling through her tablet.

hear that. Anyway, I was thinking we should redecorate the guest room this weekend. Maybe add a little color." I blinked, trying to keep up. "Uh, sure. Whatever

already back to her tablet.

my eyes for a moment. I remembered how Sarah would have

in my voice, and the tired look in my eyes.

wanted to talk about it or just sit with me quietly. And I would always

snapped

opened my eyes to see

or something bold? You're the one who has to look at it too, you

sure. Light is fine,"

watched her for a moment, trying to find the