You’re Mine by Penny Brooks

Chapter 125

Harper

"It would be so much easier if I still didn't feel like shit!"

I throw myself onto my bed as Sadie paces back and forth as if that's going to help the trauma of the day. Why can't things be easier?

I do love him. I do. I just feel betrayed. Hurt.

And exhausted, quite honestly, I could nap for ten days and probably still not feel rested.

Maybe it's the fact that I was so sick and jumped right back into school, the trauma of my mom finding us, or feeling guilty over not telling my parents about the love of my life.

Wow, take your pick.

"He's an asshole,’ she finally says. "Let him sweat it out a bit."

“Would you?"

I ask. "Let Ryan sweat it out?

Or would you communicate?

Hear him out?

Be mature?

I don't even know what I want to do. One minute, I want to run Easton over, the next I want to hold him and never let go.

He's mine, Sadie. Mine. I love him. I just...I don't understand this side of him. The one that's still holding back, the one that's afraid.”

She sighs. “Love is scary, babe. No matter how young or old you are.

It has no prejudices, it is what it is. One day, it cuts you so deep you think you might bleed out, the next day you wonder how you ever lived without that feeling.

It simply exists and you live in it because on those good days, the really good fucking days,

that person holding your hand and standing by

all sucks, I know if you really love each other, you'll get through it, fight for it, and come out on

her hands. “He's

it, and then I burst into

hate that I missed school when I was sick, and I feel so much pressure over finals and getting into

feel like a true

tilts her head. "Blake seemed extra friendly today. Wanna talk

shrug. "He was

wanted to be my partner in gym. I let him because honestly everyone else was pairing up while I was throwing a pity party and he

"Was he nice?"

her fingernails. "For Blake, I mean, since all the

was. We

and it at least distracted me

still think something's

"Yeah."

can't put my finger on it. "Maybe. I don't know. Either way, it was a horrible day and I hate that I

"Blake?"

to my laptop and open it. "Let me

sounds at my

himself in. "Hey, beautiful, mind if I borrow you real

Sadie

then shoves him. "Nope, wait, you're friends with

Yes, I knew, blah, blah, blah, you all want to murder me,

loves you. He would never cheat on you. Besides,

fill my eyes.

“Anytime.”

her out of my room, leaving me alone with my

a deep breath and get

And then I type.

I know we

if I'm just letting life kick my ass, but I miss you. I don't want

fast, but... can't text you, so I at least thought I could email and let you know that no matter

And I'm still yours.