Harper

 I didn’t want to go to Blake’s party, and I tried to come up with every excuse in my head to back out.

I even ran a few of them past Sadie once I found out Easton was dead set on going.

But each excuse I gave to my best friend, she returned with the same reply—that I was going no matter what, and her sassy self didn't want to hear any more abott it.

Anxiety ate at me all day.

I could feel it in my hands while I was getting ready, my eye liner a wobbly line, far too thick and beyond repairable.

But after that joint we smoked in the car and the electric blue punch that I've been sipping from Blake’s kitchen—that probably has thirty different kinds of alcohol in it, oops, whatever—I hate to admit that I’m actually having fun.

But I really am.

Blake’s game room, which is more like an arcade, is where we've spent most of the night.

The boys have been battling out an epic game of beer pong, Sadie and I jumping in to partner with them when we're not lost in our own war of Ms.

Pac—Man or bowling— because, of course Blake has a bowling alley in his basement.

And whenever we run low on drinks, Blake sends one of his servers to refill our glasses.

I've never been to a high school party that has waiters.

Not even Easton hires them for his ragers.

But I’m not surprised that Blake has gone all out, he doesn’t do anything half—assed.

Even as he’s standing next to Easton, partnering with him on this round of pong, he looks perfect.

His hair is more styled than mine.

His outfit is so put together, I swear he uses a Stylist.

He catches me looking at him and smiles and when he finishes the round with Easton, he comes over to the bowling area where Sadie and I are hanging out.

says, clinking

a good time?” He looks up

“Damn, you're on fire.

I admit, laughing, watching Sadie’s

toward my glass—“and I just might be getting

we've ever been, and I know that.” “Damn it!” Sadie shouts at her

hate this game.” “You do know I've only ever wanted to protect you, right?” he says

don’t want anyone hurting

“Thank you,” I whisper, feeling his words, the impact of each one nestling into

known you've had

doubted him, but that's when I've allowed Sadie and Easton and Aisha to

and the way it’s

“Good.” His grin grows.

for you.” “What am I doing wrong?” Sadie whines, a quick glance telling me she went for a third try, even though she technically isn't supposed

in the air, like she’s trying to actually

back to Blake,

and the name calling and the WHGOSSIP posts—go away.” When I realize how silly I sound, that Blake doesn’t have control over any

none of this is in your control, but it’s getting to be a lot.” “You don’t deserve

happening? Who am I hurting so

“I wish I knew.

wish I could take it all away and replace it with happiness.”

a full glass of

grabs them off the tray

good news is,

she attempts a fourth try and fails again,

a new

it off with a fucking dud of a

the last New Year's I'll ever celebrate

to college, everything is

we all return home for the holidays, who knows if we'll all even get

We could lose touch.

totally different

this party,”

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