Chapter 39: Due Date


I was eight months pregnant. Hayden had been in a coma for six months. I refused to pull the plug on him. My dad made sure that they wouldn't pull the plug on him. When I reached my due date, I was still pregnant. My dad came back for the birth, but it didn't happen.

"Are you sure that I'm nine months?" I asked my OBGYN. She nodded.

"I'm positive. You're baby is just late. We can induce labor," she suggested. I shook my head.

"No. If she's not ready, I don't want to force her," I said.

"Are you sure?" Luca asked me. He still went to my doctor's appointments with me because I didn't want to go by myself. I nodded.

"Let her comes when she wants," I said. "I'm only a few days late anyway. I'm going to go see Hayden," I said. I saw Luca's face twitch slightly as he tried to keep the look of disappointment and guilt off of his face. I ignored it as the doctor wiped the gel off of my stomach. I got a picture of my baby before I went to the hospital to see Hayden. I went in alone. I just talked to him.

"Hayden, our baby is going to come any day now; our little girl. I want you to be there with me in the delivery room... please wake up," I said softly. His heart monitor started beeping erratically. Doctors and nurses rushed in with machines and medicines. They pushed me aside and started working on him.

"What's happening?" I asked, scared.

out of here," a doctor barked orders. He continued barking orders to nurses and other doctors as I was led out of the room. I looked in through the window as tears streaked my face. Heart failure? I thought he was stable. None of this was making any sense. Suddenly everything was moving slowly. As I peered into the window, I found myself screaming and banging my fists against the glass. This couldn't be happening. I prayed that this wasn't happening. I hoped that any minute now I

watched as they stopped working on him. They rolled the machines out and closed the curtains, blocking my view of them bagging him. I screamed and fussed and kicked. I went into full blown hysteria. I felt arms go around me, trying to calm me down. I was still sobbing uncontrollably but I'd stopped screaming. I crumbled. My heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. And the fact that I moved like that with a beyond pregnant belly was a mystery. My knees wobbled

clung to Luca's arm as I cried.

eyes. I kept them shut, still hoping I was dreaming. Luca held me tightly and

You and your little girl will be okay," Luca said softly. I didn't want to hear it. I just sobbed and cried right there in the hallway

put a hand on

okay, Jo?" he asked. I sighed and

starting to hurt," I said, ignoring the real reason

you don't want to hear this now, or really ever, but... we need to start making arrangements for the funeral," he said softly. I swallowed the lump that started forming in my throat as my

right... I don't want to hear it," I

There was nothing we could

hoarsely. "I don't want to think about it. I just want to get this baby out of me and go to sleep and never wake up," I said. He

alive," he said. I sighed and went back to my bed. I paced again and ran my fingers through my hair before I closed my eyes, my

you love. That's bound to happen, but believe it or not, this isn't the end of the world. You will have a baby soon, and you'll have someone new to love; that baby. And

be miserable until

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