Down the Rabbit Hole (Stuck On You)

Chapter 39: Due Date

I was eight months pregnant. Hayden had been in a coma for six months. I refused to pull the plug on him. My dad made sure that they wouldn't pull the plug on him. When I reached my due date, I was still pregnant. My dad came back for the birth, but it didn't happen.

"Are you sure that I'm nine months?" I asked my OBGYN. She nodded.

"I'm positive. You're baby is just late. We can induce labor," she suggested. I shook my head.

"No. If she's not ready, I don't want to force her," I said.

"Are you sure?" Luca asked me. He still went to my doctor's appointments with me because I didn't want to go by myself. I nodded.

"Let her comes when she wants," I said. "I'm only a few days late anyway. I'm going to go see Hayden," I said. I saw Luca's face twitch slightly as he tried to keep the look of disappointment and guilt off of his face. I ignored it as the doctor wiped the gel off of my stomach. I got a picture of my baby before I went to the hospital to see Hayden. I went in alone. I just talked to him.

"Hayden, our baby is going to come any day now; our little girl. I want you to be there with me in the delivery room... please wake up," I said softly. His heart monitor started beeping erratically. Doctors and nurses rushed in with machines and medicines. They pushed me aside and started working on him.

"What's happening?" I asked, scared.

stable. None of this was making any sense. Suddenly everything was moving slowly. As I peered into the window, I found myself screaming and banging my fists against the glass. This couldn't be happening. I prayed that this wasn't happening. I hoped that any minute now I would wake up to realize that this was all just a terrible nightmare. But it didn't

that a piece of my heart died. I watched as they stopped working on him. They rolled the machines out and closed the curtains, blocking my view of them bagging him. I screamed and fussed and kicked. I went into full blown hysteria. I felt arms go around me, trying to calm me down. I was still sobbing uncontrollably but I'd stopped screaming. I crumbled. My heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. And the fact

I clung to Luca's arm as I cried. He pushed my hair away from my face and

I kept them shut, still hoping I was dreaming. Luca held

You and your little girl will be okay," Luca said softly. I didn't want to hear it. I just

up in the fetal position, but I was already carrying someone who was doing that. I put a hand on my stomach when I felt a kick. Since my baby was full term, her kicks really paced a punch. I let out a breath and closed my eyes. It hurt. She kicked again and again. I let out a little yelp and started pacing to calm her down.

he asked. I sighed and

starting to hurt," I said, ignoring the real reason why I wasn't okay. He paused a

we need to start making arrangements for the funeral," he said softly. I swallowed the

want to hear it,"

was nothing we

it. I just want to get this baby out of me and go to sleep

alive," he said. I sighed and went back to my bed. I paced again and ran my fingers through my hair before I closed my eyes, my tears falling as I did so. "Then why don't I feel that way? Why do I feel so empty? Why

of the world. You will have a baby soon, and you'll have someone new to

be miserable until