Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

he doesn’t love me. Never had and never will. That was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still wanted to hear his reply.

clears his throat, obviously

not?” Noah asks again,

in defeat. “I love her

was a placation

eyes against the rush of pain that fills me. After all this time. It still hurts. I feel my heart breaking all over again. I don’t know why a small part of me had hoped that his answer would be

gave birth to

gave him my all but he gave me nothing

were three of us in our marriage. Him, me and the love

I was tired of crying.

rude

through the silent space. Interrupting my thoughts in the process.

stands near the kitchen counter. My now

mocking grey eyes pins

son. My pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are

them a

Noah places his half eaten sandwich down and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to me and hugs my mid-section. “I’ve missed

too, my love” I kiss his forehead before he steps away from me and goes

This used to be my home, but now I feel out of place in it. Like

though, I

in mind. This was HER dream house, everything down

planning on letting her go. That

are you doing here?” he asks in annoyance and stares at his watch. “You promised you wouldn’t interrupt my

the divorce degree today and I thought I could bring

like this, a piece of me breaks. I’ve loved him since I can remember but that doesn’t mean a

has broken my heart and shattered my soul. I continued loving him. Holding on. Thinking things

The love I’ve been craving since I was a child. I was wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always fighting with the ghost of his past. The ghost of a girl I could never measure up to

ease the pain that was

still fucking hurts even though

discuss something” Rowan says through

for a

fighting” he

ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger.

my son” the words leave his lips in a growl. His hands are