Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still wanted to hear his reply. Would he tell our

clears his throat, obviously stalling.

do you love mommy or not?”

“I love her for giving me you”

was a placation not

all this time. It still hurts. I feel my heart breaking all over again. I don’t know why a small part of me had hoped

got married or when I gave birth to Noah, nor after in the

the entire duration of our marriage. I gave him

there were three of us in our marriage. Him, me and the love of his life. The woman he’s refused to

I rub them way. I was tired of

rude to listen to

space. Interrupting my thoughts in the process. I square my shoulders

the kitchen counter. My

pins me to the

eyes shift to my son. My pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are definitely curtesy

them a

and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to me

too, my love” I kiss his forehead before he steps away

there awkwardly. This used to be my home, but now I feel out of place

truth though,

he built this house with HER in mind. This was HER

have been the first indication that he wasn’t planning on letting her go. That he wouldn’t reciprocate my love

doing here?” he asks in annoyance and stares at his watch. “You promised you wouldn’t interrupt my

divorce degree today and I thought I could bring you the copy while I pick

his lips form a thin line. Every time he looks at me like this, a piece of me breaks. I’ve loved

my soul. I continued loving him. Holding on. Thinking things will

Marriage turned to be a nightmare. I was always fighting with the

my chest. Trying to ease the pain that was

no good. It still fucking hurts even

mother and I need to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched

looks between us for a

he

ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on

to my damn office instead of interrupting my time with my son” the words leave his lips in a growl.