Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Divorce decree

I get out of my car and slowly walk towards the mansion. My hands were trembling and my body was sweaty.

I still couldn’t believe that it was done. That I was finally divorced from him. The proof of that was currently in my handbag. I was here to bring the final papers to him and to pick Noah up.

Entering the house, I follow the sounds of hushed voices but stop in my tracks when I near the kitchen.

Right now I could hear them clearly and what I heard encased my soul in ice.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t live with me and mommy?” Noah asks his father.

My shaking hands go to my chest. My heart breaking at the sadness in his voice. I would do anything for him, but this divorce was inevitable.

Our marriage had been a mistake. Everything about us was a mistake. It just took me a while to see the truth.

“You know why Noah, you mother and I are no longer together” His voice is soft as he replies.

It’s weird really. That during the duration of our marriage he has never once spoken to me softly. It was always cold. Always flat and devoid of any emotion

“But why?”

“These things just happen” he mumbles.

I can imagine his face frowning. As he tries to make Noah understand so that he doesn’t ask any more questions. But Noah is my son. Curiosity and inquisition is in his blood.

“Don’t you love her?”

My breath gets caught at the simple heartfelt question. I take a step back and lean against the wall. Heart racing, I wait in anticipation for his answer.

I knew his answer. I’ve always known what it is. Everyone with the exception of Noah probably knows that damn answer.

love me. Never had and never will. That was as clear as day. Knowing this, I still

clears his throat, obviously stalling.

love mommy or not?” Noah asks again,

defeat. “I love her for

was a placation not

eyes against the rush of pain that fills me. After all this time. It still hurts. I feel my heart breaking all over again. I

three words to me. Not when we got married or when I gave birth to

through the entire duration of our marriage. I gave him my all but he

of two, there were three of us in our marriage. Him, me and the

but I rub them way. I was tired of crying. Tired

told you it’s rude to listen to other people’s

thoughts in the process. I

kitchen

eyes pins me to

shift to my son. My pride and joy. The only good thing in my life. His good looks are definitely curtesy of his dad.

them

mommy” Noah places his half eaten sandwich down and jumps down from the counter. He rushes to me and hugs my mid-section. “I’ve

before he steps

now I feel out of place in it.

truth though, I never

in mind. This was HER dream house, everything down to the

indication that he wasn’t planning on letting her go. That

stares at his watch. “You promised you wouldn’t interrupt my

thought I could bring you the copy while I pick

thin line. Every time he looks at me like this, a piece of me breaks. I’ve loved him since I

I continued loving him.

wrong. Marriage turned to be a nightmare.

ease the

fucking hurts even though we’ve

your room? Your mother and I need to discuss something” Rowan says through clenched teeth, the word

us for a minute

fighting” he

soon as he is out of ear shot, Rowan bangs his fist on the counter in anger.

my son” the words leave his lips in a growl. His hands are fisted and he looks about