Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Sorry for your loss

“I need to go, could you please stay with Noah? I don’t know how long I’ll be there” I say absent mindedly as I pick up my handbag.

“Sure. I’ll be there as soon as I can get my mother to come baby sit him” Rowan responds but it is drowned by the ringing in my ears.

Nothing much registers as I say goodbye to my son and leave. I get inside my car and begin to drive to the hospital. My mind completely lost in memory.

Growing up, you could say that I was emotional neglected. I was the child that none of my parents cared that much about. Father’s favorite was my older sister, Emma. He used to call her his baby girl. His princess. Mother’s favorite was my older brother Travis. He was her handsome boy. I was no one favorite. I was just Ava.

I always felt unwanted. Unwelcomed. Not only with my parents but also with my siblings. No matter what I tried to do, good grades, sports, school clubs. I always remained in the sidelines. I always felt like a stranger looking in. Never part of the big happy family.

After what happened nine years ago, the little relationship I had with my family became none existence. Travis rarely talked to me and he and father would even go to great lengths to downright snub me. Mother wasn’t much different. She only talked to me or called when she had something important to tell me. With my sister that was a completely different case. We haven’t seen or talked to each other in nine years. The last words she told me was that I was dead to her. That she no longer had a sister.

Now here I am. Driving to the hospital because father has been shot and all I feel is numb. Despite everything that has happened. Shouldn’t I be feeling something more? Maybe sadness?

What are you supposed to feel when you’re told that the father who shunned you all your life is lying in bed with a bullet wound? How am I supposed to react? And is it weird that I feel nothing?

the hospital is reflective. As I think of my childhood and even part of my adulthood. The pain and hurt is still

First by my family, then by my husband and in laws. The only one who accepts me and

the hospital. We had one main big hospital in

my hair. I take a deep breath and square

a gunshot wound” I tell the receptionist once I get

“Any relation?” she asks.

“He’s my father”

computer. “Right, he is in the ER, getting prepped for surgery. Just go straight ahead, at the end you’ll see

“Thanks”

turn around and follow her instruction. My heart beating with every

going to be okay. He’ll recover soon and go back to his old self’ I whisper to

be well. He and I may not have a relationship but he’s loving towards Noah and that’s all

enter. I immediately spot mother and Travis on the waiting chair. I school

Travis” I say as

sundress is covered in blood. Travis’ eyes are dry but you can still see how much this is affecting him. He was trying to

next to her. “What happened and how is he

on about

here. The doctors say one of the bullets pierced his lungs and the other his kidney. They’re preparing him for surgery” her voice catches

nod my head. I want to comfort her. To hug

worry. Father is the strongest man I know. He’ll be okay” I try

anything. Just

hospital gown and is lying on a hospital bed. Travis and mother immediately stand