Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

4. Utterly broken

Have you ever felt like your heart has been put in a mincer? That is how I feel right now looking at them. I feel like my heart has been shredded into pieces.

If I could take the useless piece of organ and throw it away then I would. Because the pain that was tearing through me was unimaginable.

I wanted to run away. To look away, but I couldn’t. My eyes were fixed on them and no matter how I wanted to avert them it was like they were glued there. To the loving scene that was playing before me.

I watch as they separate. Rowan’s eyes soften as he stares at the love of his life. I continue to watch as he cups her face in his hands. He brings her closer to him. He doesn’t kiss her, just lays his forehead against hers.

He looks peaceful. Like he’s finally home after a long time. Like he was finally whole.

‘I’ve missed you’ I read the words forming on his lips.

I don’t want to imagine what would be happening between them right now if they had met under a different circumstance. If they had met when we were still married. Would he have cheated on me?

Part of me wants to deny that thought but I can’t be sure. After all, this was Emma we were talking about. Rowan would go to hell and back for her sake.

Unable to take it anymore. I stand up and rush outside.

The moment I get outside the tears begin to fall. It fucking hurt and I didn’t know how to numb or stop the pain. But who could I blame? I was the one at fault for falling in love with a man that didn’t belong to me.

I beg whichever higher power is there to listen

no answer though.

I couldn’t get enough air into my lungs no matter

you want a man that doesn’t belong to you” his mocking

to mock me or warn me to stay away from your precious little sister then you can walk your ass back to the hospital where your family is. There is

me cry. I won’t give them the

his face. I guess he never expected me

Rowan always belonged to Emma. Your selfishness took him away from her but now they can be together. I

out

this, none of you will have to

at me. His brows pinched in confusion. “What do you

and all I wanted was to go to sleep and forget this day ever happened. I’ll cry myself

I’ll be by to help with burial preparations, that’s if she even wants my help. And

name but

Rowan told me that Noah was with his mother. I didn’t want to deal yet with another person that hated my guts. He

one to comfort me or look after me. No

falling down

stop. If only I could go back in time and change things. Maybe right now I would be married to a man that actually

the things about the past. Once it’s happened, you can

*****************************

since father died and everyone is in turmoil. It came as shock to everyone.

Rowan since that day. He has called though multiple times but I ignored his calls. He was probably all loved up and in Emma’s arms right now. She has probably even moved

I focus on

Noah’s voice comes from

his eyes. I kneel down so that I am

my love?” I

him so much. We were supposed to go fishing with this Saturday” his voice catches