Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

5. Shoot out

Nothing about the day spelled disaster. The sun was shining and everything seemed to be well in place as I drove down the familiar streets.

The chapel was fully packed when we arrived. Almost everyone had come to pay their last respects.

I surveyed the place and was satisfied to see everything was in place. None of the others had been much help when it came to the burial preparation. I was the one that was left to shoulder the weight of everything.

I didn’t complain though. I took it as a chance for me to reciprocate what he’d done for me. After all, he had fed me, clothed me and put a room over my head.

The service was about to begin and most people were already seated. I decided to sit on the opposite side. It didn’t feel right sitting with the rest. It especially didn’t feel right sitting next to Emma.

“Mom, why are we sitting here…shouldn’t we sit next to grandma?” Noah asks, pointing at where the others were.

Of course we were getting weird looks but I didn’t care. After all, it wasn’t a secret that I wasn’t wholly accepted by the family after everything that happened.

“Most people are already seated. I don’t want us to cause a fracas” I lie.

He looks like he doesn’t believe me but choses to let it go. The father arrives and the sermon begins just as I feel someone sit next to me.

I tense. I would know his presence and cologne anywhere. I don’t know what he was doing seated here. He should be with his precious Emma. In fact I would prefer if he were there.

Damn I sound bitter. Which I was. Bitter, angry and hurt.

“Dad” Noah whisper yells, which causes a few people to turn and look at us.

I glower at them making them turn back around.

sit between the two

relief. Thank goodness for small miracles. I wouldn’t have to be near

to switch seats with him. The moment we do, I feel

question is how will you leave it? Will you have made a difference? Changed it and touched the lives of those that you met along the way? Or will you leave it with regrets?” the preacher possess

those around me even care? Whom am I kidding? They wouldn’t. They would probably

fact that I can never be good enough for anyone. I wasn’t as beautiful as she was. S**y as she was.

pain is bigger than mine. Her happiness is a priority over mine. She

me out of

realize that the service was over and everyone was

deep voice always makes

but I’ll have to because for the next ten years we’ll be sharing Noah’s

at him. I know it seems rude but I just can’t look at him. Not when the memory of him staring

on Noah, let’s

we walk towards the door. Once we’re outside we’re bombarded by a crowd of people wanting to give us their condolences. I spot some of my colleagues

yet and

finally decided to show your face” Emma’s bitter voice says

Her face was blotchy and her eyes were red and

I so didn’t want to

Can we

leans in so that I’m

to take everything back, including the man that was meant to be mine”

between me and the departing back of my sister but doesn’t say anything. I’m left shocked at her words

have to take anything back because none of them were mine to begin with. The family she’s talking about worships the ground she walks

down the pain that wanted to drown me, I lead Noah to the place that would

They’re huddled together. Looking at them and me you

dust…” the preacher says as they lower father’s body

to cover his coffin with soil until he is completely buried. Mother’s wails are the loudest as she begs for father to come back

he cries beside me. Seeing him like this brings tears to my eyes. I hate seeing him in pain. I wipe my tears away. I need to be strong for him. He

accept them mindlessly. It was like I was there but wasn’t at the same time.

ma” he drags me pointing