Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

36. His remedy

Present day.

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L

“So you see, they have a reason to hate me…I ruined their love” I mutter as tears fill my eyes.

It’s always painful for me to go down memory lane. I was naïve and foolish. Thinking that I could

ake him love me after I literally ruined his life. Nine years later and I’m still paying the price for

loving Rowan Woods.

“It wasn’t your fault?” Ethan asks me, his fingers slowly caressing mine.

“It was. I let my obsession with him take center stage and because of that I made the biggest

mistake of my life” the tears fall freely now.

If only I could go back in time. If only I could change things. I’ve lived my life in regret. I wish I

had listened to that nagging voice in my head. I wish I had payed attention to it instead of

ignoring it. It would have saved me from so much heartache and pain.

Hell, I wish I had realized earlier that I was pregnant. I could have escaped earlier. I would have

left and never told Rowan that I was pregnant with his child. No one would have been the wiser. I know it sounds downright evil but looking back now it would have saved Noah from seeing Rowan

fight

one knew me. A place so far away from my family and Rowan. A place no one knew

just been

“Ava?”

as a response. I had gotten

said it wasn’t you fault. You were also drunk, so if they were blaming you, they should have blamed

at him

believe me?” I ask

one and I mean no one has ever believed that I was drunk. They all thought I was malicious and I took advantage of an

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believe you’re also innocent?” his blue eyes seer

of hearing that I was to blame. That I wasn’t drunk at all, that sometimes I believe

his drunken state that

really. That sometimes I think that my memory is faulty. I mean if everyone says I’m guilty isn’t

other times I think that the pain I went through at Rowan’s hand was my punishment. That God was punishing me for wanting and sleeping with a man that didn’t

words when the keep forcing their truth and beliefs down your throat. That’s what happened with me. Soon after I started believing them. Believing that I was a fault. Believing that I

think of everything they put me through, Rowan especially. That a man you love could destroy

came out of that mistake is Noah. I would never regret my son. He was the one that saved. He was anchor during the times when I wanted to end it all. During the times when I felt so alone I contemplated

was born. I was so tired of the constant pain, the constant hate that I thought of it. I knew

think I was weak. Most especially I didn’t want Emma as his step mother. I knew Rowan would get back together with her and I was afraid she would transfer her hate for me to

concerning Noah, I’m glad that

both drunk so no one was to blame. You parents should have been ashamed for placing the entire blame on an eighteen year old girl. Rowan should have taken responsibility for his

I’m the one that sought

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mine and runs it through his hair. “The more I know about Rowan and your family, the more I dislike them” he says more to

don’t say anything. After all, I was beginning to hate

on” he says then helps

going?” I

wanted to stay a little bit longer. I didn’t want to go to an empty

you home…I don’t like seeing you trying to drown your

doesn’t give me time to say anything before he’s pulling me across the dance floor and out of the bar. I shiver from the chill. He removes