Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

36. His remedy

Present day.

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L

“So you see, they have a reason to hate me…I ruined their love” I mutter as tears fill my eyes.

It’s always painful for me to go down memory lane. I was naïve and foolish. Thinking that I could

ake him love me after I literally ruined his life. Nine years later and I’m still paying the price for

loving Rowan Woods.

“It wasn’t your fault?” Ethan asks me, his fingers slowly caressing mine.

“It was. I let my obsession with him take center stage and because of that I made the biggest

mistake of my life” the tears fall freely now.

If only I could go back in time. If only I could change things. I’ve lived my life in regret. I wish I

had listened to that nagging voice in my head. I wish I had payed attention to it instead of

ignoring it. It would have saved me from so much heartache and pain.

Hell, I wish I had realized earlier that I was pregnant. I could have escaped earlier. I would have

left and never told Rowan that I was pregnant with his child. No one would have been the wiser. I know it sounds downright evil but looking back now it would have saved Noah from seeing Rowan

I fight all the

where no one knew me. A place so far away from my family and Rowan. A place

have just been

“Ava?”

ask as a response. I had gotten

they were blaming you, they should have blamed him too” he

him with round

me?” I

drunk. They all thought I

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do, don’t you believe you’re also innocent?” his blue eyes seer into me. As if he was trying to unveil all my

tired of hearing that I was to blame. That I wasn’t drunk at all, that sometimes I believe that’s exactly what happened.

drunken state that sometimes I doubt the events

really. That sometimes I think that my memory is faulty. I mean if everyone

think that the pain I went through at Rowan’s hand was my punishment. That God was punishing me for wanting and

and beliefs down your throat. That’s what happened with me. Soon after I started believing them. Believing that I was a

heart aches when I think of everything they put me through, Rowan especially. That a man you

that mistake is Noah. I would never regret my son. He was the one that saved. He was anchor during the times when I wanted to end it all. During the times when I

of the constant pain, the constant hate that I thought of it. I knew that Rowan would take

leaving Noah would mean. I didn’t want him to think I was weak. Most especially I didn’t want Emma as his step mother. I knew Rowan

me concerning Noah, I’m glad that I had chosen to stay strong I wasn’t going

were both drunk so no one was to blame. You parents should have been ashamed for placing the entire blame on

I’m the one that sought

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and runs it through his

say anything. After all, I was beginning to

then helps me

we going?”

wanted to stay a little bit longer. I didn’t want to go to

you home…I don’t like seeing you trying to drown your sorrows”

across the dance floor and out of the bar.