Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future

I can’t sleep. I can’t get what Kas told me about not being able to have children out of my mind. I mean, there is nothing I can do about it. It doesn’t change the way I feel about her. She is my world. I just feel like having a pup of our own is something we assumed would be part of our future. I meant what! said about just needing her in my life. If we end up not having kids, then that is what the Moon Goddess has fated for us.

The text message chime on my phone goes off. I look to see it is from Reggie. It is eleven-thirty at night. What could he want?

Hey Bronx. You awake? Important.

I mind link Reggie to let him know Iam awake and will meet him in the downstairs kitchen in five minutes.

I go give Kas a kiss and wake her up just enough to let her know where I’m going. She gives me a squeaky little grunt and waves me away before rolling over. I grab an eye patch and secure it in place before quietly making my way out of the apartment.

“All good, Alpha?” Marco sends in a mind link.

“Yeah, Marco. I let her know I'm going downstairs. She’s sound asleep,” I confirm, “Just going to talk to Reggie. I'll be back soon.”

“Ten-four, Alpha,” Marco nods looking a little more at ease.

Reggie is already in the kitchen, rummaging through the pantry when I get there. He is still dressed in his all black tactical gear for work. I slow down as I get to the doorway feeling hesitant. Something feels off with him. “Hey Reggie, you just get home?” I ask, tentatively.

“Uh, yeah. Hey wasn't there some of those cookies Kas makes? The oatmeal ones with the toffee pieces?” he asks, still rummaging.

“No, I think they got eaten up. You know that shit doesn't last long around here,” I chuckle. Something is definitely off with him, “What's so important, Reggie? I know you didn’t ask me to meet you at almost midnight to ask me about cookies.”

He finally closes the pantry door and puts both hands on the counter, with a deep sigh. He drums his fingers on the counter in a nervous rhythm trying to figure out what to say. I look at his fingerless gloves to see that he hadn't even taken the mini blades out of the flat top pockets. Whatever is on his mind must be serious if he didn’t even disarm himself before coming into the packhouse. I look closer and see where he is drumming his fingers is leaving bloody fingerprints on the counter.

I look up to see he has dried blood coming out of one of his ears and his nose. Not to mention a pretty wicked black eye and a split lip. That's when I pick up on the the strong metallic scent of blood, much stronger than what it should be from his face. I look closer to see his bulletproof vest is soaked in it. I do my best to not let my eye go wide. I don't want him to see me panic.

your blood, Reggie?” I ask

looks down at his

Not mine.”

something, Bronx? Something's not right here,” Saint whines, worried

man, spit it out,” I urge him on, “What's wrong? Did someone die or

icy blue eyes shift

I search his expression to try

Alpha. Classified mission, classified intel,” Reggie shakes his head, then runs his fingers through his short strawberry blond hair, “but

do you need

I think you're about to say, I think to myself, because I won't be able to say

He stands up straight and puts his hands out to the sides then on his hips, looking down at the floor, like he's disappointed in himself. He shakes his head as he speaks to the floor. It almost seems like he is talking to himself, not me, “I know you can't. I know it. It is not good for anyone. Not your body or your mind. It’s not

“Reggie, I-”

is in the hospital wing fighting for his life right

trust you? You have been a bit of a wild card lately,” I ask, sensing him

I'm

that answer doesn't give me much confidence,” I

small taste of special ops, then back into retirement,” he says more calmly, “You telling me you don't want to go on one mission,

Reggie again, “When do we leave and how long will we

Get some sleep tonight. You're gonna need it. This one is a doozie, bro.” He turns around when he gets to the doorway, “Bronx. Thank you for this.” I simply nod and watch him walk away. I sigh again and pull out cleaning supplies. I can't have Mrs.

I just signed myself up for a black ops mission that

kkk

this

as I imagined in my head during my walk back up to the apartment. I had woken Kas up and told her about my conversation with Reggie.

at me. Please come out of the bathroom. Come out and talk to me.” The door swings open and my little mate comes out with a small angry growl,