Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future

Milo’s POV

Marco had told us to find her binder before Bronx ordered us to lock him in solitary confinement. He said Kas kept note cards and binders for everything. We just had to find the correct binder to figure out what she was up to. He couldn't tell us anymore because of some sort of potion he had swallowed. He was right. We rifled through dozens of binders in her office until we found one in her desk drawer that had a sticker labeled ‘Manae Notes’.

It detailed everything, complete with cute pictures of rooms and furniture she wanted to use magic to create so her sisters would be comfortable in the home she was building for them. Some of the note cards were actually thin sheets of parchment that looked like they were hundreds of years old. Others were thick handmade papers that were crumbling on the edges. There were at least six different languages among the cards. Musu helped us translate most of them, but a few she said were in dead languages she wasn’t familiar with.

Regardless, they all pointed to the fact that Kas has known for centuries that there were problems within the Manae that needed to be fixed, and she was taking it upon herself to fix it. Looking at the notecards, it all seems very hopeful and sweet. In any other format, you recognize she is a damn genius.

It just seems like she went about things in kinda fucked up ways over the course of her lifetimes. From the information James has got off Kas’s server blade, it's hard to tell if she was playing a part or she really didn’t know any better. Either way, history shows, Kas isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty.

I wish she would have felt like she could have told us, but after reading about the things she has done in the past and knowing Kas as well asI do, I bet she was embarrassed to have to admit to some of those things. She is also the type of person who thinks she can’t share her problems with others, so I can see where she felt like she was on her own little island with all this stuff.

We kept our discovery a secret for a few weeks until we walked by Bronx’s office one day and the door was wide open. We had taken the binder out of Kas’s office so our MasonCo tech team could start scanning and archiving everything. Bronx stupidly threw it into the fireplace before we could have time to do that. Then he ordered us not to talk about Kas anymore and wouldn't listen to reason. If he would have just let us tell him about her plan, about what she was really doing, maybe he would have changed his mind and not rejected her. Maybe we could have convinced him to go look for her instead.

Reggie and I assumed when the guardhouse mind linked us, they were bored and fucking around or it was some sort of magic trick by the Mavri Magea. Either way, we needed to check it out. There is no way Kas would come back, would she? We all assumed she got corrupted by dark magic and left us. As soon as I get out of the car, Ican smell her cinnamon roll scent and I know it isn't a trick.

My heart breaks for her when she cries and apologizes for what happened to Lenora. I can see how much it pains her and any doubts I had, whether she was involved or not, have been alleviated. Kas may have kept secrets from us, but it was for good reason and she doesn't have it in her to be dishonest.

What I wasn’t ready for was her physical appearance. Kas isn’t just too skinny, she also looks like shit. Her hair isn't sparkly gray anymore. It has turned completely white in just a few months. Her skin is dry and blotchy and pale. The dark circles under her eyes make it look like someone punched her, and she didn’t defend herself. Her eyes...I don’t know how to even describe it. They went from violet and full of life to practically white and devoid of anything. It seriously looks like she could be in one of those zombie movies as the main character that got bit but hasn't died yet.

Alarm bells go off in my brain when we see how pregnant she is. I know Bronx hasn't been the easiest wolf to deal with the past four months, but I’m sure if he knew Kas was pregnant when she left, he would have never rejected her. He would have fought harder to find her and his pups. How the Hell did she survive the pain of being rejected, anyway? Who knows? We just need to be grateful that she didn’t accept the rejection. He would have become impossible to be near.

“How are we getting her into the packhouse?” Reggie whispers when he looks into the back seat and sees her sleeping.

“Up the back staircase. We can take her to my apartment. Codi is at daycare, no one will have a reason to go into my place,” I say not taking my eyes off the snowy road, “I think the real question is, how the Hell are we going to get Bronx to listen to us?”

Reggie heads to the kitchen to get a snack and a protein shake ‘for himself, while I take our Luna up to my apartment. She doesn't even try to wake up when I lay her on the sofa and lay another blanket to put on top of her.

and I step into the hall. He

I'm trying to be hopeful here, but let's be honest. This is

can’t keep it a secret from him,” I clap

her

We can only hope that he’s sloppy about it and we can still take care

we tell him about the

moment, “Yeah. I think it’s the ace up

and wait for him to tell us to come in. He is at his desk reading the newspaper, but he has yet another bottle of

talk to you,”

why people usually knock on the office door, Reggie. Not because they want to stare at me in silence,” Bronx says without looking away from the

waves his hand at me. Okay, here

she’s back.

at me with glassy

to say her name, but I can’t. Then I remember he ordered us not

says like he is ordering a steak and

“No. Dude, she’s-”

paper back down and

doctor and needs to be fed. She’s-” Reggie tries to step

to heal herself. If she can't, let her rot,” he snarls with anger, pounding his fist on

listen? She’s pr-” I start, but he interrupts me

tone, “ Take her to the dungeon. She doesn’t get access to a doctor or anyone else in the fucking pack. Security twenty-four, seven and feed her scraps from the trash, like the pig

roll off of Bronx. I can’t believe he is saying this about Kas. He can’t really feel this way. He can’t expect Reggie and me to treat her that way. She’s our Luna. We both step back, forced to bow

OUT" he roars again. I look at Reggie and turn

believe he didn’t let us get a word in. How are we going to

choice do we have,

Come on,” he waves me on to follow

even going to see her and see what the fuck he’s doing, I’m done. I'm going to figure out how to find the Manae, take Ashley and Katie, and