“I’ve finally found a worthy groom for you, darling,” announced Father, as he wiped off his lips with a napkin.

 

Laying on the knees of my oldest brother Cesare, I felt the urge to run back to my bedroom and throw up all the food I’d just eaten.

 

My second brother Enzo, who had been busily chowing down on an awfully smelly quenelle, slammed his fork down and cried out in protest.

 

“Not again! Father, how many times has it been already?”

 

“Enzo.”

 

“It hasn’t even been three months since her last engagement was called off! Regardless of what our family would gain from this marriage, shouldn’t you at least try to consider her feelings?”

 

“What a surprise to see you side with your little sister. Then would you rather battle the barbarians yourself instead of accepting Britannia’s support?”

 

“What are you talking about? Those savage barbarians up north wouldn’t stand a chance against the likes of me, the greatest, most noble soldier to ha—”

 

“Shut your trap, boy.”

 

The great noble soldier took the rest of the quenelle on his plate and shoved it into his mouth, aggressively chewing in protest.

 

The marriage proposal wasn’t any surprise to me though. I knew that it would come sooner or later.

 

“Who is it, Father?”, I asked cheerfully.

 

My father, who had been staring disapprovingly at Enzo, looked back my way and smiled.

 

“He’s Britannia’s hero. The king’s beloved nephew and famous knight of the South. He’s very handsome, I’m sure you’ll like him.”

 

“What! Father, do you know how bad his reputation is?!”

 

“Boy, was I talking to you?”

 

Enzo became quiet again.

 

idea that this handsome knight would one day massacre their entire family. Oh

 

“Ruby?”

 

my head, called for me again. This time his long fingers groped the back of my head. I shuddered in revulsion. It felt

 

eyes with Cesare. After glancing at his eerie azure eyes, I shifted my gaze to Enzo who was frowning discontentedly, and then to Lady Julia and my father beside

 

grateful that I can at least be of some service to you with this

 

his lips into a rare gentle smile and pressed them up against the top of

 

sweet little angel,”

 

I really wanted to

 

throwing up. After all, the

 

***

 

that my tiresome life had at last come to an end and I could finally rest. But if I’d known that I would be reincarnated as a lady in the Renaissance Era, and as a

 

a character in this novel, couldn’t I have at least

 

“Ugh!”

 

feel my stomach tense up and my eyes begin to water. I’d gotten good enough at throwing up silently that I didn’t need to

 

was anorexia, or as people call it nowadays, an eating disorder. Before I became Rudbeckia de Borgia—I mean before I died—I was an adopted daughter of an upper-class family in

 

was born. Like my adoptive siblings, I attended a

 

sometime around 4th grade, when a boy in my class laughed at me while pulling back his eyes. At first I didn’t understand what it meant, so I just laughed along with the rest of

 

school, but as for my life at home, despite the sophisticated, welcoming facade of my adoptive family, there was always an unspoken rule that I was to be treated differently, that I was

 

was publicly exposed for his promiscuous private life and drug addiction. The only one in my adoptive family who would sometimes treat me

 

it became a habit for me to play the role of a smart, cheerful, and obedient daughter, since if I ever brought the smallest bit of shame to my family or offended

 

away. But when I looked in the mirror, instead

 

few days to realize that I’d become Rudbeckia de Borgia, a character in the fantasy novel Sodom and the Holy Grail I used to read as

 

pope who abused his power to subjugate others. It was a story about the countries of the North and the

 

to the people of the northern Romagna region of Italy, and ‘Holy Grail’ was a metaphor for the holy site of

 

die, and to die no less than at the

 

Rudbeckia, and after three unsuccessful engagements and another last minute cancellation, she

 

why someone as noble and austere as Izek would lose his mind and decide to murder his wife’s entire family

 

mind, it was hatred—hatred of Rudbeckia, who’d poisoned his

 

being mad about Rudbeckia killing his little sister, it seems like Izek just got fed up with his backstabbing b*tch

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