How to Get My Husband on My Side

Anyhow, he was undoubtedly a strange man.

Despite the way Cesare obsessed over me and clung to me, he didn’t show the slightest hesitation using me as a pawn in his political schemes. For all I know, maybe he just thought of me as another one of his objects.

Three years ago, when I’d just gotten accustomed to the fact that I’d become fifteen year-old Rudbeckia, I made the mistake of refusing my arranged marriage to the Duke of Rembrandt.

With the foreknowledge that the duke would later become a key figure in the demise of my family, I invalidated our marriage right before the wedding was scheduled to happen using the humiliating pretense of ‘bodily incompatibility’.

I wanted to do whatever I could to protect my new family that had treated me so well and stop whatever enemies would later plot against them.

But as soon as I expressed my unwillingness to marry him, Father’s usual warm expression morphed into an ice-cold frown that made my body tremble with fear in a way I was all too familiar with. That night I was locked in my room and beaten by Cesare until I nearly passed out from pain.

It was after those events repeated themselves a couple times that I realized there was no difference between my old and new life. Maybe, in part, that was also because I knew that Rudbeckia wasn’t actually the pope’s biological daughter.

Rudbeckia’s biological mother—my mother—was killed as soon as she gave birth, before the pope met his second official lover, Carmen. Most people around me were already suspicious that I wasn’t the pope’s legitimate child, and, well, since I’d already read the story myself, I knew their suspicions were correct.

Putting on a facade and pretending to be family with people that didn’t share a drop of blood with me, it was identical to my previous life. And after I became Rudbeckia, my anorexia manifested itself again as well.

“It hurts me to see you go too. This’ll be the last time something like this happens, I promise,” said Cesare.

“But I heard it’s dangerous there…”

“Dangerous? You’ll be guarded around-the-clock by a legion of elite knights, you have nothing to worry about. I’ll try to come visit you as often as I can too. It won’t be that bad, every place has something to like about it. Just think of it as a six-month-long vacation.”

“Six months? It’s really going to be six months?”

I already knew exactly how long it was going to be but I pretended to be surprised anyway.

He chuckled and wrapped a lock of my hair around his finger, pulling it up to his nose.

“Yeah, you just have to make it six months. He won’t do anything to you regardless, so you don’t need to worry.”

That wasn’t what I was worried about.

“You’ll really come visit me often?”

“Yeah.”

I prayed that he wouldn’t.

kill me was going to be difficult enough as it was. Even

I had to start by convincing my husband and the other people around me, all

I’d been forced to act with my

***

Izek van Omerta.

the title of knight at fifteen years old and at age seventeen was crowned the kingdom’s youngest champion of the famed

a paladin, he became even more renown and celebrated amongst the people, but, because of his stubborn, headstrong personality, he refused every one of the marriage proposals he received, much to the displeasure of his

his younger sister, Ellenia van Omerta, and his childhood friend, Flaya van Brianna. If

and gave birth, she ended up killing herself while her children were still young. It

that a soul who committed suicide was destined for eternal damnation, so

read the novel that my memory of a lot of the story was vague at best.

had obediently accepted his marriage with Rudbeckia wasn’t due to any sort of coercion from his father, it was because

on their northern border, and, with the added difficulty of internal conflict,

the aid of Britannia’s elite knights—that was the point of these

worked at lightning speed to prepare the wedding. A huge dowry and an assortment of elaborate gifts were sent to Britannia, and after my marriage was made

***

get used to it, but every time I looked in the mirror I was still startled

eyes were shining blue lakes. Her supple cheeks and tender lips didn’t resemble my original body in the slightest.

was a child, I was always sensitive about how I looked different than the other kids around me, but, funnily enough, there are times now when I miss my

said Father with a warm smile, pulling me towards him and hugging

fully-grown adult, but I was still considered and treated like a child in many ways. Like how Cesare

wonderful bride, my darling. The North

“Father…”

be upset. Don’t cry, my dear. We won’t

saw each other. Of course I cried though, that was part

seeing my delicate face

to miss you

so much, my dear. I would send your brother to accompany you on the trip if I could, but it’s impossible right now,

the visitors from the North watch our family like vultures. Did Father really not care about the

bullsh*t! Am I the only one who’s upset by this?

“Enzo.”

here you

by himself, hugged me tightly. Despite Enzo’s fiery temper and all the mischief he caused, I never felt uncomfortable around him. In a way, he really

“I’ll miss you.”

miss