Anyhow, he was undoubtedly a strange man.

 

Despite the way Cesare obsessed over me and clung to me, he didn’t show the slightest hesitation using me as a pawn in his political schemes. For all I know, maybe he just thought of me as another one of his objects.

 

Three years ago, when I’d just gotten accustomed to the fact that I’d become fifteen year-old Rudbeckia, I made the mistake of refusing my arranged marriage to the Duke of Rembrandt.

 

With the foreknowledge that the duke would later become a key figure in the demise of my family, I invalidated our marriage right before the wedding was scheduled to happen using the humiliating pretense of ‘bodily incompatibility’.

 

I wanted to do whatever I could to protect my new family that had treated me so well and stop whatever enemies would later plot against them.

 

But as soon as I expressed my unwillingness to marry him, Father’s usual warm expression morphed into an ice-cold frown that made my body tremble with fear in a way I was all too familiar with. That night I was locked in my room and beaten by Cesare until I nearly passed out from pain.

 

It was after those events repeated themselves a couple times that I realized there was no difference between my old and new life. Maybe, in part, that was also because I knew that Rudbeckia wasn’t actually the pope’s biological daughter.

 

Rudbeckia’s biological mother—my mother—was killed as soon as she gave birth, before the pope met his second official lover, Carmen. Most people around me were already suspicious that I wasn’t the pope’s legitimate child, and, well, since I’d already read the story myself, I knew their suspicions were correct.

 

Putting on a facade and pretending to be family with people that didn’t share a drop of blood with me, it was identical to my previous life. And after I became Rudbeckia, my anorexia manifested itself again as well.

 

“It hurts me to see you go too. This’ll be the last time something like this happens, I promise,” said Cesare.

 

“But I heard it’s dangerous there…”

 

“Dangerous? You’ll be guarded around-the-clock by a legion of elite knights, you have nothing to worry about. I’ll try to come visit you as often as I can too. It won’t be that bad, every place has something to like about it. Just think of it as a six-month-long vacation.”

 

“Six months? It’s really going to be six months?”

 

I already knew exactly how long it was going to be but I pretended to be surprised anyway.

 

He chuckled and wrapped a lock of my hair around his finger, pulling it up to his nose.

 

“Yeah, you just have to make it six months. He won’t do anything to you regardless, so you don’t need to worry.”

 

That wasn’t what I was worried about.

 

“You’ll really come visit me often?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

I prayed that he wouldn’t.

 

it was. Even if I refused to poison his little sister, someone else

 

to stop my husband’s little sister from being poisoned in six months, I had to start by convincing my husband and the other

 

any different than how I’d been forced to act with my

 

***

 

Izek van Omerta.

 

he was given the title of knight at fifteen years old

 

of his

 

sister, Ellenia van Omerta, and his childhood friend, Flaya van Brianna. If I remember correctly, his standoffish personality was, in large part,

 

was passionately in love with the duke, but after she became the duchess of Omerta and gave birth, she ended up killing herself while her children were still young. It seems

 

a soul who committed suicide was destined for eternal damnation, so their mother’s death consequently became a taboo

 

long since I had read the novel that my memory of a lot

 

marriage with Rudbeckia wasn’t due to any sort of coercion from his father, it was because

 

was struggling to fight off barbarians on their northern border, and, with the added difficulty of

 

aid of Britannia’s elite knights—that was

 

at dinner, Father worked at lightning speed to prepare the wedding. A huge dowry and an assortment of elaborate gifts were sent to Britannia, and after my marriage was made official

 

***

 

that after three years I would eventually get used to it, but every time I looked in the mirror I was still

 

blue lakes. Her supple cheeks and tender lips didn’t resemble my original body in the slightest. The only

 

looked different than the other kids

 

daughter,” said Father with a warm smile, pulling me towards

 

a fully-grown adult, but I was still considered and treated like a child in many ways. Like how Cesare would always sit me in his lap and pat my head like I was some

 

make a wonderful bride, my darling. The

 

“Father…”

 

be upset. Don’t

 

ever saw each other. Of course I cried though,

 

chuckled seeing my delicate face covered

 

to

 

my dear. I would send your brother to accompany you on the trip if I could, but

 

It was scary enough seeing the visitors from the North watch our family like vultures. Did Father really not care about

 

accept this bullsh*t! Am I the only one who’s upset by this?

 

“Enzo.”

 

Come here

 

and all the mischief he caused, I never felt uncomfortable around him. In a way, he really was the

 

“I’ll miss you.”

 

miss

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