Letting My Brother's Best Friend Take My V-Card

JERK LAURA

I stomped up the stairs, each step harder than the last, my heart pounding in my chest. My skin was still hot, my mind racing with everything that had just happened. By the time I reached Jess's room, I felt like I was going to burst.

Throwing myself face-first onto her bed, I groaned into the pillow, muffling the sound so no one would hear me. I was such an idiot. Such a fucking idiot.

Why had I even said that? What had I been thinking? "I want you to have sex with me"? Seriously?

I slammed my hand down onto the mattress, wishing I could rewind time. Of course, Josh didn't want to spend the night with me. Why would he? He was just letting me down easy, trying not to hurt my feelings because he was nice like that. Nice. That word made me want to scream.

The truth was glaringly obvious, and it had been all along. Josh didn't see me that way. I wasn't a cheerleader or one of the girls he flirted with in the halls. I wasn't confident or cool or sexy. I was... Laura. Shy, quiet, artsy Laura. The girl who blended into the background. I rolled onto my back, staring at the ceiling as frustration bubbled in my chest. God, I hated this. I hated feeling so small, so invisible.

No.

I sat up abruptly, the fire in my veins reigniting. I wasn't going to be this shy, stupid little girl who didn't take what she wanted. If Josh didn't want to help me-if he didn't want me-then fine. Someone else would. Some guy out there would see me, really see me, and they'd want me.

But deep down, I didn't want just some guy.

My fists clenched at my sides as stood, adrenaline coursing through me, giving me a rush of courage I didn't fully

understand. I needed to talk to Josh, to give him a piece of my mind, to make him see me for who I was.

across the

second, my hand hovering over the door, before taking a deep breath and pushing it open. "Josh," I started, my voice firm but low, "we need

words died in my throat as I

from his room but from the adjoining bathroom, the door wide open. Steam

Josh.

and over the ridges of

moving with a grace that was almost hypnotic. My eyes traveled downward, tracing the water as it slid over his lower back,

look away. He leaned forward, bracing one hand against the shower wall, and

It was moving.

doing. It didn't click. But then his hand sped up, his movements more urgent, and I heard

A low grunt.

flipped, and heat flooded my face as the realization hit me like a

Oh my God.

I should have turned around

forward under the spray of water. His hips rocked slightly, his

felt my knees go weak, my breath catching in my throat

the hell was I

swallowed hard, the sound deafening in the quiet room. For a split second, I thought he might hear

me. My hands were trembling, my heart racing as I bolted back to

That was... that was...