Chapter 161- Selene Gets a Letter

Selene

“Mommy, are you wake?” A little voice speaks in my ear.

Slowly I return to the waking world, blinking open my tired eyes and registering the warm little body snuggling up against me. “Hello little bean.” I murmur, wrapping my arms around Lila and pulling the covers more tightly around us.

Lila hasn’t slept through the night in her own room since Bastien left. Instead she’s taken to crawling into my bed somewhere between the hours of midnight and dawn, which both warms my heart and makes handling my morning sickness more difficult. Today the sun is just beginning to rise, and Helene’s soothing draughts have actually managed to ease the worst of my symptoms, so I’m happy to simply lie here and cuddle with my daughter until we’re ready to get up.

“Mommy, I had a dream ’bout Daddy.” Her morning puppy breath is terrible, so I tuck her head beneath my chin, earning myself a mouthful of her hair.

“You did?” I inquire, smoothing down her tangled locks, “was it a nice dream, hope?” 

“Uh-huh.” She nods against my breast. “We were playing pony, an’da flying game.”

“That’s wonderful.” I breathe, honestly elated that she’s not having nightmares like I am. I hate that she misses him so much, but I’m glad her dreams are sweet memories rather than horrible possibilities. Ever since talking with Helene, my nights have been haunted with terrible images of Bastien hurt, imprisoned, or dead.

“Mommy, will Daddy be home soon?” Lila wonders aloud.

I’m fully awake now, with a large lump caught in my throat. “I don’t think so, sweetheart.” I admit.

She looks up at me in alarm, and I wonder if my honesty was a mistake. “Why not?”

“Because things aren’t going so well. It might be some time before we see him again, Lila.” I confess.

red as tears well in her eyes. “But I wan’him home!” “I know, angel.” I hush her gently, wiping

of tears myself. “If I could bring him

She accuses. “You pwomised he wouldn’be

don’t know everything sweetheart, we can only do

care!” She cries, pushing me away

down I know this is just my baby being a toddler and testing her limits, but my heart doesn’t think with

more than anything in the world.” I vow firmly, trying to rub her back and earning a wail for my efforts. “I know I’ve

responsibilities sweetheart. I’m sorry you’re hurting, but one day you‘ll

She insists,

anywhere.” I choke out the words. “That’s not how this works. You can be upset with me all you want, but I’m going to be

squealing and beating her hands and feet against the mattress while I sit next to her and try to push down my own feelings. It’s no use, within seconds I’m crying too, breaking into a sob and burying my face in my hands instead. I can only imagine the picture we make. If

be me and Lila against the world, but finding a mate and a

one having a meltdown, and is now determined to see my face. Sighing heavily I drop my hands and show her my red

“I miss your

me.“ Is okay, Mommy.” She sniffles, “I make it better.”

can speak again. “I haven’t been giving you enough attention. Why don’t we do something special today,

like dat.”

shakily, swiping at my cheeks. “Let’s make a deal okay. No more tears today,

Lila nods enthusiastically, “Deal.”

By the time we get back to the pack house Lila is passed out in her car seat, and I have to carry her

and all offer to take Lila from me. However I don’t want to let anyone else have her.

the main living area that a knock sounds on the door, and I find a sentry holding an envelope which was apparently just delivered via courier. It takes a second for me to realize why the guard’s expression is so urgent, but then Bastien’s scent hits my senses like a ton of bricks. I snatch up the envelope, ripping it open and eagerly extracting its contents. Excitement and relief when I recognize Bastien’s handwriting, but as I begin to read confusion

Selene,

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