Chapter 161- Selene Gets a Letter

Selene

“Mommy, are you wake?” A little voice speaks in my ear.

Slowly I return to the waking world, blinking open my tired eyes and registering the warm little body snuggling up against me. “Hello little bean.” I murmur, wrapping my arms around Lila and pulling the covers more tightly around us.

Lila hasn’t slept through the night in her own room since Bastien left. Instead she’s taken to crawling into my bed somewhere between the hours of midnight and dawn, which both warms my heart and makes handling my morning sickness more difficult. Today the sun is just beginning to rise, and Helene’s soothing draughts have actually managed to ease the worst of my symptoms, so I’m happy to simply lie here and cuddle with my daughter until we’re ready to get up.

“Mommy, I had a dream ’bout Daddy.” Her morning puppy breath is terrible, so I tuck her head beneath my chin, earning myself a mouthful of her hair.

“You did?” I inquire, smoothing down her tangled locks, “was it a nice dream, hope?” 

“Uh-huh.” She nods against my breast. “We were playing pony, an’da flying game.”

“That’s wonderful.” I breathe, honestly elated that she’s not having nightmares like I am. I hate that she misses him so much, but I’m glad her dreams are sweet memories rather than horrible possibilities. Ever since talking with Helene, my nights have been haunted with terrible images of Bastien hurt, imprisoned, or dead.

“Mommy, will Daddy be home soon?” Lila wonders aloud.

I’m fully awake now, with a large lump caught in my throat. “I don’t think so, sweetheart.” I admit.

She looks up at me in alarm, and I wonder if my honesty was a mistake. “Why not?”

“Because things aren’t going so well. It might be some time before we see him again, Lila.” I confess.

her gently, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “I do too.” “I’s not fair!” She exclaims, heading straight towards

Lila.” I proless, on the verge of tears myself. “If I could bring him home for you

She accuses. “You pwomised

know everything sweetheart, we can only do our

cries, pushing me

down I know this is just my baby being a toddler and testing her limits, but my heart doesn’t think with that kind of

her back and earning a wail for my efforts. “I know I’ve been busy lately and

responsibilities sweetheart. I’m sorry you’re hurting, but one day

I won’!” She

out the words. “That’s not how this works. You can be upset with me all you want, but I’m going to be here whether you like it or

her and try to push down my own feelings. It’s no use, within seconds I’m crying too, breaking into a sob and burying my face in my hands

Lila against the world, but finding a mate and a father made us both realize what we’d been missing, and now it doesn’t feel like enough just being together. One day we might get there again,

my wrists. Apparently she realized she wasn’t the only one having a meltdown, and is now determined to see my face. Sighing heavily I drop my hands and show her my red eyes and miserable expression. Her two-tone eyes widen as her full lower lip quivers violently. “I sorry, Mommy, please don’ be

explain forlornly, “I miss your Daddy, and I hate seeing you

okay, Mommy.” She sniffles, “I make it better.” She presses sweet little kisses to my wet cheeks, and I moan

sorry, Lila.” I confide, when I can speak again. “I haven’t been giving you enough attention.

like dat.” She

at my cheeks. “Let’s make a deal okay. No more tears today,

Lila nods enthusiastically, “Deal.”

going to a movie with Lila, we’re both fairly exhausted. By the time we get back to the pack house Lila is passed out in her car seat, and I have to carry her all the way to the top floor to

Odette and the Betas are all there, and all offer to take Lila from me. However I don’t want to let anyone else have her. I

why the guard’s expression is so urgent, but then Bastien’s scent hits my senses like a ton of bricks. I snatch up the envelope, ripping it open and eagerly extracting its contents. Excitement and relief when I recognize Bastien’s handwriting, but as I begin

Selene,

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