Chapter 161- Selene Gets a Letter

Selene

“Mommy, are you wake?” A little voice speaks in my ear.

Slowly I return to the waking world, blinking open my tired eyes and registering the warm little body snuggling up against me. “Hello little bean.” I murmur, wrapping my arms around Lila and pulling the covers more tightly around us.

Lila hasn’t slept through the night in her own room since Bastien left. Instead she’s taken to crawling into my bed somewhere between the hours of midnight and dawn, which both warms my heart and makes handling my morning sickness more difficult. Today the sun is just beginning to rise, and Helene’s soothing draughts have actually managed to ease the worst of my symptoms, so I’m happy to simply lie here and cuddle with my daughter until we’re ready to get up.

“Mommy, I had a dream ’bout Daddy.” Her morning puppy breath is terrible, so I tuck her head beneath my chin, earning myself a mouthful of her hair.

“You did?” I inquire, smoothing down her tangled locks, “was it a nice dream, hope?” 

“Uh-huh.” She nods against my breast. “We were playing pony, an’da flying game.”

“That’s wonderful.” I breathe, honestly elated that she’s not having nightmares like I am. I hate that she misses him so much, but I’m glad her dreams are sweet memories rather than horrible possibilities. Ever since talking with Helene, my nights have been haunted with terrible images of Bastien hurt, imprisoned, or dead.

“Mommy, will Daddy be home soon?” Lila wonders aloud.

I’m fully awake now, with a large lump caught in my throat. “I don’t think so, sweetheart.” I admit.

She looks up at me in alarm, and I wonder if my honesty was a mistake. “Why not?”

“Because things aren’t going so well. It might be some time before we see him again, Lila.” I confess.

eyes. “But I wan’him home!” “I know, angel.” I hush her gently, wiping the tears

tears myself. “If I could bring him home for you this second, I would.

She accuses. “You pwomised

“Mommies don’t know everything

cries, pushing me

down I know this is just my baby being a toddler and testing her limits, but my heart doesn’t think with that kind of logic, my heart just sees my pup in pain and breaks into pieces knowing. I’m

rub her back and earning a wail for my efforts. “I know I’ve been busy lately and we haven’t gotten to spend as much time together, but that’s not by choice. If

grown ups have responsibilities sweetheart. I’m sorry you’re hurting,

She

going anywhere.” I choke out the words. “That’s not how this works. You can be upset with me all you want, but I’m going to be here whether you like

seconds I’m crying too, breaking into a sob and burying my face in my hands instead. I can only imagine the picture we make. If Bastien was

It used to be me and Lila against the world, but finding a mate and a father made us both realize what we’d been missing, and now it

paws tugging at my wrists. Apparently she realized she wasn’t the only one having a meltdown, and is now determined to see my face. Sighing

“I miss your

climbs into my lap without a moment of hesitation, wrapping herself around me.“ Is okay, Mommy.” She sniffles, “I make it better.” She presses sweet little kisses to my wet cheeks, and I

haven’t been giving you enough attention. Why don’t we do something special

dat.” She

at my cheeks. “Let’s make a deal

Lila nods enthusiastically, “Deal.”

a full day of playing in the park, painting pottery and going to a movie with Lila, we’re both fairly exhausted. By the time we get back to the pack house Lila is passed out in her car seat, and I have to

all offer to take Lila from me. However I don’t want to let anyone else have her. I put

I find a sentry holding an envelope which was apparently just delivered via courier. It takes a second for me to realize why the guard’s expression is so urgent, but then Bastien’s scent

Selene,

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