Secrets of Us A Forbidden Love Romance (Alina)

Chapter 78

Love Me, Too

I turn on my heels to look at the tree.

Half of it is decorated, and the rest of the ornaments lie in the box. I stare until my eyes burn. It would be beautiful. It would be whimsical, but all I see is the mess I've created.

Aiden's furious face flashes in my mind. Fuck, what was I doing? I'm not a cheater, I can't be. That's terrible. No one deserves that kind of betrayal. I should have ended things with him the moment I felt something for Zaid.

But even that thought doesn't sit right in my chest. Being with Zaid and not Aiden feels

wrong.

I shake my head, pressing a hand to my chest as a wave of emotion drowns me.

Does that mean I have to leave them both?

Pain lances through me.

I would have to move out. Find a job, get an apartment.

Tears prick the back of my eyes.

Zaid's dark, piercing eyes come to mind then, and my knees give out. I sink to the floor, the weight of everything crashing down on me.

Tears blur my vision, and before I know it, I'm sobbing uncontrollably. It all comes at once. The guilt, the confusion, the heartbreak.

My chest feels tight, like I can't breathe.

I think of Aiden's hurt, Zaid's intensity, and my own traitorous feelings. I think of Jake, his warmth and steadiness, and how I've tangled myself in this impossible knot.

How can I live without them?

And at the same time, how can I live with them?

I cry into my hands, letting my love for the three of them express out of me in long sobs.

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Love Me, Too

And then there's the ache of Alex's absence, and the hollow void where my dad should be

this Christmas.

It's all too much.

them. I shouldn't be smiling and laughing and moving on. I

trying to stifle the sobs, but they rip through me, anyway. My breathing becomes shallow and erratic, and I

opening.

through me. Who could it

myself together, wiping my face hastily and curling

in a ball on the floor. But it's Jakes who

he can

first. The way his brows furrow and his lips part in silent awe makes my

hits the floor with a thud

his voice soft but

can manage

his hands cupping

What happened?"

form words.

hesitation, holding me tightly as I

around his neck and let my

hair, his touch soothing, grounding

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3.15 pm

Love Me, Too

the top of my head. "I'm here. It's okay,

my legs and wraps them around his waist. He stands as if I weigh nothing

his neck.

me upstairs to his

reach his bed, he sits down, settling me on his lap and wrapping his arms around me. His warmth surrounds me, his steady heartbeat lulling me into

quiet.

at him. His

nod, pressing

to talk about

breath catches in my throat. Do I want to talk to him about how I'm

him

two sons?

I shake my head.

frowns. "Do you want me to

at that. "That would

lips, and

downstairs.

there, letting myself catch my breath and kind of feel

not all as terrible as it

this deep, dark tunnel.