Chapter 80

The Equation

I wake up with a heavy weight still in my chest, but it's accompanied with the warmth of Jake beside me.

His hand is splayed on my stomach and his lips pepper light kisses down my neck. Such a soft and gentle way to wake up compared to the storm brewing inside me.

He's a comfort I never knew I needed.

I can't imagine not having this, not having him to turn to. The way he makes me feel safe, understood, and, if I'm honest, wanted. But it's more than that. I can't stop replaying the way he looked at me last night, the quiet plea in his voice when he asked me to stay.

How happy, although conflicted, it made me feel to hear those words from him.

I sit up carefully, and he stops kissing me, his fingers holding onto me like I would disappear. "Where are you going?"

I chuckle through my nostrils and run my hand through his hair. "I have to go, Jake. I

can't be in here."

He thinks about it for a second before reluctantly letting me go.

"Thank you for last night," I whisper.

"Are you going to think about what I said?"

I look down at the sheets. "I won't be with you in secret, behind his back."

Jake looks away from me for a second. "Then we'll tell him."

My heart jolts in my chest. "No. Not now."

He turns to me, eye dark and serious. "But we will? Eventually?"

"I have to think about it."

He frowns at me, as if for the first time, thinking that I might not want him. Of course I

know that's not true.

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The Equation

not kissing Jake, not holding him,

together in secret

won't. But can I break up with

clenches at the thought. And then

the way he kissed me, like he was pouring every ounce of emotion into me, igniting something in me that I didn't even know was there. The way he made me feel alive had me questioning everything about what I was doing with Aiden

wanted.

my way to my room and change really quickly. I head to the bathroom where I

day and numbly walk to

by the

hands shoved into

I nod, brushing my hair back nervously as I

out.

coffee shop is small and cozy. Aiden orders for us and we find a quiet loveseat

into the corner.

doing little to

fidgeting

searching mine.

Zaid,"

know that, but still, the words land like a stone in my chest. My heart hammers, the muffled

despite the overwhelming urge to

his jaw tightening before

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The Equation

hand. My thumb brushes his cheek, the familiar gesture grounding me. "That's

return the smile. He looks conflicted, his lips parting slightly

then

has my anxiety skyrocketing.

throat.

my stomach twisting. This is it. The moment to be honest. I can't

to him.

for both of them, and

barely, but it's

flinches, his hand retreating from my knee as his expression tightens with hurt. He leans back, putting space between us, but I quickly

cupping his face again.

away," I

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