Shadows In Durango

Chapter 123

*****Vincent's POV*****

The silence in the car was killing me.

I kept my eyes locked on the road, gripping the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles pulsed around the leather.

The tension between us was thick, almost suffocating, and I figured that it wouldn't have been so severe since we had both spent some time apart...

But boy was I wrong!

I could feel her growing antsy beside me, fidgeting, probably lost in her own worried thoughts, and all I could think about was how badly I'd screwed this all up from start to finish.

I knew that I couldn't avoid this conversation any longer, but damn, I still wasn't as ready for it as I thought I would be.

Not even close.

There was a million things to say and to talk through, yet all I could give her right now was thickening silence...

She had every right to be angry, every right to hate me for how I had handled things. The way I'd kept her in the dark. The way I'd gone behind her back.

But what the hell was I supposed to do?

Did she expect me to just sit back and watch her get pulled into even more danger? Watch her father finally catch up with her? Watch her get hurt because of me?

I only thought I was helping...

I glanced over at her, just for a second, and saw the tension in her face, her hands twisting nervously in her lap below.

She was hurting like I was over this, probably more.

And I hated it.

knowing that I was the one who'd put that very look on

the silence anymore. I

Anything.

this, you know," I said quietly, not daring to look at her. My eyes stayed glued to the

and I could feel her gaze burning into the side of my face. "What? I mean, how?" Her voice was

hair, trying to figure out how to explain myself. "I don't blame you for what happened to Daryl. I'm

Daryl getting shot at all, but I knew it probably seemed that way with how I had

real fucking monster here, and yet why could I see the

my words, and then, almost like she couldn't stop herself, she whispered, "I feel that I'm responsible for all of this. If I hadn't come into

she said it, like she really believed she was a curse,

was wrong, but I didn't. I had no right to snap at her, not

into this willingly," I said, trying to stay calm, even though part of me wanted to punch something just thinking about that bastard alone. "He made his own choices, and he hurt people because of his own issues. That's nothing to do with you. But..." I hesitated, knowing what I was about to say wasn't going to be easy for her to hear. "What was to do with you, was not telling

it didn't bother me. She should have told me. I needed her to tell me. To trust me

to keep

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when she finally spoke, her

her voice shaking with the weight of her guilt. "You seemed so stressed and on edge that at the time, I didn't want to selfishly add another problem on top of that... but what I didn't know was that your stress all linked back to contacting my father behind my back... Why didn't you

were ones that hit me hard next,

say to that? She's

comes after that, I was truly at a loss for words as

didn't you just tell me?!" She demands to know, her emotions taking their toll now

second to think... allowing my head to

start now. I'd run it over in my head a thousand times, thinking through all the things I would say when we found her, but now that we were actually here,

this heavy

I had chose to reach out to the one person she feared most in

had fucked up majorly, I knew that, but I was now fucking terrified

I raised my head, forcing myself to face her on this. She was staring

like that, hurting, when she had already been hurt many times before, now hurting because

safe, I didn't know he was going to manipulate the situation like he did, and the whole arranged marriage thing wasn't mine or my fathers idea, it was all him - believe me!" I begin to spill out, hoping

intentionally, but the same fact still remained - I should have discussed it with her from the very start