Chapter 289 Ava: Who He Is

The way Lucas watches me is terrifying.

Terrifying, because there's finally interest in his gaze.

I don't want to hold hope, because every time I have even the glimmer of it, he says something that crushes my heart. The way he doesn't even recognize our fated bond kills me. It's yearning, aching in my chest, wanting me to go to him. To claim him. To shake and scream until he remembers all the pain and all the joy between us.

Instead, I sit there, scratching more vigorously at my arms, and the string inside of me tugs harder, as if trying to get my attention. I ignore it.

"Your scent."

Glancing at Lucas, who stops talking mid-sentence, I sniff discreetly in the direction of my armpits. Did I forget to scrub? He keeps talking about my smell.

"Do I stink that bad?"

"It's getting stronger," he confirms, his voice husky.

Maybe this is his way of getting me to leave again. "Do you want me to go?"

"No."

Oh. Never mind, then.

My heart dances at that denial, though, raising hope high on a flag pole and waving it at the walls I've tried desperately to construct around my heart.

never leave me. They're golden and

he finally recognizing the

That would be great.

wash over me. Lucas's scent, amber and campfire smoke, fills my senses, and I'm transported back to Cedarwood. Back to when he'd found me, after I'd run away from

nothing to do with you, but you stuck around anyway. You were determined, and I was just afraid you'd leave me again. Change your mind at any time. But you never once blamed me for how

remember those early days. "You'd break into my apartment while I was at work. Spread your scent around. It should

but he

voice barely above a whisper. "And awkward too. It's endearing, really. The way you bend over backwards to keep me happy, to keep me

"You saved me from my family, Lucas. You're the

of everything he's done for me, everything he's been

my voice cracking slightly. "I can't even begin to understand how you can be so strong, so secure in your love, especially after... after all the times I pushed

gaze

I'm a complete stranger. He's starting

the words tumbling out before I can stop them. "You were always there, waiting for me to turn to you. And now... now

chest. Lucas grunts, a low sound that reverberates through

* * *

"How'd it go?"

on me as soon as I walk through the door, her eyes shining with optimism and

body shivering at the memory of his eyes burning into me. "I don't know. Every so often, I think he's getting a hint of the bond. Then he says something so

a pitiful handful of chips. I raise an eyebrow at her,

sure when you'd come home, so I helped

a punch to the gut. Is this really home now? It feels temporary, but our home isn't ours any longer. What does it look like now? I'm not

my lunch, my appetite suddenly gone. "It's

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