Chapter 313 Ava: What Do You Think I Should Do?

Grimoire's presence inside of me is unfazed after his revelations from the morning. I swear his book form even looks cheerful, sitting there on the table.

You seem worried, Selene says, sounding distracted.

"I am. I still don't agree with Grimoire."

About the summoning?

"Yes. Wouldn't you know if you were summoned?"

I suppose. Selene goes quiet for a bit, before asking, How does Lucas feel about it?

Lucas.

He's standing by the window, watching the light rain drizzle across our world. The soft patter of droplets on glass is the only sound outside of my voice. Sister Miriam and Vester left a while ago, leaving us to contemplate our next move. Lucas hasn't spoken since they departed, his thoughts as opaque as the cloudy sky outside.

"I don't know."

He seems ambivalent to the idea of summoning his wolf, but I can't blame him.

After dropping the bomb of Selene's alleged summoning—though she denies it—he did mention the possible negatives.

While Lucas would not lose his sense of self, he might lose his wolf. Like me, he would exist as a human. But unlike me, he wouldn't have magic to bridge that supernatural gap.

No healing. No strength. What would happen if he were challenged then?

Is it any better than now?

His wolf would be strong, but can an Alpha survive without his internal wolf? Would the pack accept that?

waist, pressing my cheek against the broad expanse of his back. The steady thump of his heart echoes

in

large hand covers mine where they rest on his stomach. His touch is warm, familiar, and yet so new. We stand like this as

of his scent fills my lungs, surrounding me in assurance, soothing the anxiety beating in

voice breaks the silence, low and rumbling. I can feel the vibration of his

options before us are all shit, covered in more shit, until it becomes a

it weren't for the

it weren't for

we'd have more

be forced

so many

I admit softly. "There's so much

fingers tighten slightly over mine.

weight of the world

sense of self… I worry that you would feel as if you were living half a life without

know how it feels

the bond any normal shifter has with their wolf. Distance can create emptiness within our bond. And—scariest of all—I can die and leave her alone

she can die, and

I worry about what that would mean for you as Alpha. Would

silent, but I can sense him

to him. "And selfishly, I miss you. The you who remembers our

turns in my arms, his golden eyes searching my face. "I feel that connection with you," he says softly. "Even without the memories, there's something

feel it too," I

touch gentle. "But this isn't just about us.

leaning

you regret that we are not

I admit. But I can't imagine not being

the same

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