Chapter 313 Ava: What Do You Think I Should Do?

Grimoire's presence inside of me is unfazed after his revelations from the morning. I swear his book form even looks cheerful, sitting there on the table.

You seem worried, Selene says, sounding distracted.

"I am. I still don't agree with Grimoire."

About the summoning?

"Yes. Wouldn't you know if you were summoned?"

I suppose. Selene goes quiet for a bit, before asking, How does Lucas feel about it?

Lucas.

He's standing by the window, watching the light rain drizzle across our world. The soft patter of droplets on glass is the only sound outside of my voice. Sister Miriam and Vester left a while ago, leaving us to contemplate our next move. Lucas hasn't spoken since they departed, his thoughts as opaque as the cloudy sky outside.

"I don't know."

He seems ambivalent to the idea of summoning his wolf, but I can't blame him.

After dropping the bomb of Selene's alleged summoning—though she denies it—he did mention the possible negatives.

While Lucas would not lose his sense of self, he might lose his wolf. Like me, he would exist as a human. But unlike me, he wouldn't have magic to bridge that supernatural gap.

No healing. No strength. What would happen if he were challenged then?

Is it any better than now?

His wolf would be strong, but can an Alpha survive without his internal wolf? Would the pack accept that?

cheek against the broad expanse of his back. The steady thump of his heart

anchor in the

covers mine where they rest on his stomach. His touch is warm, familiar, and yet

The warmth of his scent fills my lungs, surrounding me in assurance, soothing the anxiety

His voice breaks the silence, low and rumbling. I can feel the vibration of

shit, covered in more shit, until it becomes

the state of

weren't for the

we'd have more

we wouldn't be forced into

so many times, life isn't

don't know," I admit softly. "There's so much

slightly over mine. "Tell me

weight of the world in

you keep your sense of self… I worry that you would feel as if you

feels to be so

the bond any normal shifter has with their wolf. Distance can create emptiness within our bond. And—scariest of all—I can die and leave her alone in

she can die, and

worry about what that would mean for you as Alpha. Would the pack accept a

silent, but I can

to him. "And selfishly, I miss you. The you

his golden eyes searching my face. "I feel that connection with you," he says softly. "Even without the memories, there's something right about being with you. It's here." He taps his chest, then mine. "Something inside of me

swells. "I feel

gentle. "But this isn't just about us. I have a responsibility

nod, leaning into his

we are not one body? Selene asks, still

admit. But I can't imagine not

is the

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