The Alpha’s Fated Outcast: Rise Of The Moonsinger

189 The truth of her birth III Miriam .

Its been two weeks since I came back to the Moon Temple with an empty womb and a heart heavier than Id ever known .

The stillness of the temple at all times which used to ground me in such a way I couldnt understand , broken occasionally only by the soft rustling of robes or the distant chant of prayers had now become a prison to me .

I was the secret , trapped in a prison and the only people who knew were my wet pillow each night and my conscience .

I couldnt believe I was a mom well a half mom actually but that experience changed my life in ways I never expected .

Each day felt heavier than the last my belly was still round and protruded .

I was still too tired from carrying another human for nine months and still forced to get on with my life like nothing just happened .

Of course , no one noticed since I returned in Spring and we were always at our busiest at this time of the year because a lot of special flowers , herbs and seeds are found at this time .

I simply went out of my way and kept myself away from unnecessary interactions .

Except for Terra my bosom friend , Mother Liora and the other priestesses who were Mother Lioras closest friends no one else knew .

For instance , at the morning Assembly today when I was asked to lead the e prayers , had recited a ritual prayer instead of the prayers designed to kickstart our day .

Superior Priestess Dianas eyes had narrowed on me as she assessed me from head to toe .

Miriam , she called out coldly .

You look … different .

Sluggish in your movements , forgetful and fat .

Is there something you wish to share ? My breath caught in my throat , my heart pounding in panic as I tugged at my uniform , stretching the already stretched fabric .

The pregnancy had made me add a lot of weight on my hips and chest .

Although the midwife had prepared a special routine for me to follow to lose the baby fat , she had told me it was a gradual process .

Everyone was staring at me in the hall , especially Jemimah who had a smirk on her face .

Miriam ? she called out impatiently again .

15 189 The truth of her birth Im sorry , Mother ! I muttered .

I didnt ask for an apology , she responded , her voice was filled with frustration .

T simply want an explanation as to why youre looking out of place from all the girls in the temple .

Your uniform is too tight , your face is round and are those dark circles I see around your your eyes ? I opened my mouth , looking for an explanation but no words came out .

Before the silence could become suspicious , Mother Liora intervened .

The little self discovery trip I sent her on must have been harder on her than I thought , she said giving me a reassuring glance .

Its not uncommon for children to go outside this pack and come back looking the same .

Think of all the overly processed food and all … Mother Liora said .

and the conversation turned to something else but I

my bed staring at

baby wasnt inside me anymore , but my body hadnt accepted that truth yet

soft and rounded and my muscles still ached with the strain of carrying a child that

my side , clutching my blanket tightly and cried myself

followed , I was living in

the cruellest

would instinctively move to cradle the

I bend to pick something up

dropping to my knees first just like how it had done when I

and hard as stone and still

had given me

clothes to hide the milk stain and for the entire day , I would be conscious of

would be unbearable and I would have to sneak back to

an expert at hiding

of needing solitude for prayer , only to sit in the corner of my small

contractions were the worst

pain and I would gnash my teeth , clamping down on it waiting for

, I

of her birth !!! 10 when the sound of

was filled with desperation and

my room , searching the hall for the

, I met

my hand ; she must have seen the wild desperation

dear ? Its after lights out

about ? My baby ! I

, I need to get to

Priestess Tania exhaled , looking sideways to make sure there was no one in the

me to my room and a moment later , she came back with Mother

and the endless cries that were ringing in my

sitting at the edge

! I murmured

do you feel ? she asked me , touching

! I nodded giving

? She avoided my gaze

know youre suffering Miriam , and you feel guilty but if you keep this up , everything will

limit to the excuses I can

noticed that something is not right and I would like for it not

I do again , mother ? You were roaming the hallway last night looking for your baby

priestess Tania who saw

you taking the medications the midwife recommended ? I nodded hanging my

must try ,

it is with you but

for too long and Im not sure how long we can hide

… I lowered my gaze , Im sorry ,

Ill do better .

placing a hand

through a great deal , child

I understand that .