The Alpha’s Fight for His Omega by Jess K

Chapter 52

***Chastity***

When I woke up the next morning I was exhausted. I hadn’t slept well at all. I didn’t have nightmares, I just didn’t sleep well. I was also very depressed. The thought of pushing Rowen and Lexi together had plagued my mind all night. He would be better off matched with her. I didn’t understand why the Moon Goddess would punish him by leaving him stuck with me.

“He is not stuck with you Chastity. We are perfect for our mate.” Leila growled at me.

“But….” I started.

“No. Enough! He is ours Chastity! He loves us! Lexi is NOT right for him. We are! We always have been. Besides Lexi is our friend. She would never take our mate from us. She would be mad if we tried to give

him to her.”

“But she is. She already knows how to be a good Luna. She understands him, and his responsibilities. She is prettier, and more poised than I am. She’s not broken.”

“Chastity, you’re so wrong. Does she know those things? Yes. But it doesn’t make her right for him. We are right for him.”

“But. He’ll be better off. I should just reject him, and let him be with Lexi or someone like her.” 1

“NO! Absolutely not Chastity! I have supported everything you have done, every choice you have made, but I will NOT support that. Now or ever! He is ours, and we are his! If you even TRY to reject him I will take over, and stay in control until he marks us. I won’t let you do that to us. Mate loves us, and wants us. You need to accept that, accept him. His right for us, and we are right for him. Maybe you don’t believe it now, but some day you will.” 1

“But Leila….”

“NO! ENOUGH! You are not going to reject him, and you will not push him to our friend. She wouldn’t take him even if you tried. Now stop. Doctor is waiting for us. You need to tell her about yesterday, and this conversation. She needs to know so she can help you.”

“But…”

“NO!”

For the first time ever Leila blocked me out. In all our years together she had never done that. I didn’t understand why she was so against letting Rowen free from me. He deserved to be happy, and with someone better than me. He could never be happy with me long term. I didn’t understand why she

couldn’t see that.

With a sigh I picked up Lilac to put her harness on. She glared at me the whole time I struggled to get it. on her then rolled, and wiggled once I put it in her. After she finished with her dramatics I clipped the leash on her, picked her up, and carried her out of my room. She instantly climbed on my shoulder, and sat there the whole walk to my appointment with Dee-Dee.

I really didn’t want to see her, or anyone for that matter. It’s why I didn’t go down to breakfast either. I hadn’t wanted to talk to Norm or Lexi. Especially not Lexi. I wasn’t sure how I was going to tell her about me rejecting Rowen, and wanting them to be together. They were bettered suited for each other. I just wasn’t ready to talk to her about it.

For the first time in my life I was almost late to something. I drug my feet as I walked into Dee-Dee’s office. She was already sitting on the bean bag chair across from my usual spot. She smiled at me, and I

tried to do the same. I just wasn’t feeling it. I took Lilac off my shoulder, and sat. Dee-Dee stood up. closed the office door then took off Lilac’s leash. The kitten tried to get into my lap, but I pulled my knees to my chest, and buried my head in them. I didn’t want to be here. I didn’t want to talk. I just wanted to be left alone. Lilac didn’t quite get the message though because she started climbing on me. I tried to shake her off, but she wouldn’t stop.

“She knows you need her Chastity. She’s not going to leave your side right now.” Dee-Dee said gently.

I finally stopped trying to push Lilac away. She managed to get under my shirt, against my side. It tickled when her fur brushed me. Then she settled, and began to purr softly.

“Bad day today, Chastity?” Dee-Dee asked quietly, and I just shrugged..

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I shrugged again.

“Ok. We’ll just sit here until you feel like talking.”

I nodded.

We sat there in silence for a long time. I didn’t want to talk at first, then I didn’t know what to say or how to start. I had so much running through my mind. Then I remembered Rowen saying I should tell Dee-Dee about yesterday.

“I froze up in self defense class, then curled into a ball on the floor, shaking and crying. I couldn’t breath. I couldn’t move.” I said quietly.

“What happened?” Dee-Dee asked.

“I heard a noise, and I got scared.”

“So you had a panic attack?”

“I don’t know.”

“What was the sound?”

“It sounded like a whip.”

“How did you calm down from your panic attack?”

“L…Lexi carried me out of the gym, and too my bedroom.”

“What did you do once you were in

your room?”

“Nothing.”

“What did Lexi, and Norm do?”

“Lexi….she called Rowen when he is busy. She pulled him from his important work. He has things to do. Responsibilities, and she called him to deal with the broken little Omega. She made an Alpha stop what he was doing to help a nobody.”

“How did Rowen react when she called him? Did he help?”

“Yes.” I whispered.

“Did he seem upset about it?” Dee-Dee asked gently.

“No.” I answered quietly.

“Did he talk to you during, and after your panic attack?” She questioned.

“Yes.” I said.

down from the panic attack?”

“Yes.” I whined.

good thing. That’s what mates

things for me. He didn’t deserve to be stuck with me. I stood up

AND CANNOT DEAL WITH LIFE! I CANNOT BE WHAT HE NEEDS! I’LL NEVER BE A GOOD LUNA! I WILL DESTROY EVERYTHING FOR HIM! HE DESERVES BETTER! SOMEONE WHO WILL MAKE HIM HAPPY! SOMEONE WHO WILL HELP HIM BE THE ALPHA HE IS MEANT TO BE! SOMEONE WHO WON’T MAKE HIM WAIT BECAUSE SHE IS BROKEN! HE DESERVES SOMEONE WHO IS HIS MATCH IN EVERYTHING! I’M A NOBODY! I’M NOTHING! HE DOESN’T DESERVE A NOTHING! HE DOESN’T DESERVE A NOBODY! HE DOESN’T DESERVE A WORTHLESS DISGUSTING OMEGA WHO SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN BORN! HE DOESN’T DESERVE TO BE STUCK WITH SOMEONE WHO SHOULD

and tears were streaming down my face. I just didn’t understand why no one saw what I did. Why couldn’t HE see what I did? He had to. It would be better for

that you talking or Aurora, Fiona, Naomi, or all of those others that said those things to you, talking?”

as I

you talking or was it just what you’ve been told by others?” Dee-Dee asked again as she looked me straight in the

does it matter who said it first? It’s

Is it

“Yes!”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why is it true?”

have been loved by my family. I would have had friends. I

those things about yourself why are you

“What?”

to become a midwife? If you really think those things you wouldn’t have worked so hard to get here. You wouldn’t be here right now, attending this school, if you really believed those things. So I will ask you again, is that you speaking or is it everyone else who has said those

“1….”

Rowen’s rejection? Why didn’t you instantly reject

reject him. He deserves better than me. He deserves someone like Lexi, or any other high rank she-wolf out there. Not me. He shouldn’t have taken his rejection back to

think he’ll accept

too good for me. He

why did he take the rejection back? Why did he come see you last weekend?

know. Because he pities me. If I don’t reject him now, eventually he’ll reject me any way. At least if

think he

I’m nothing! I’m worthless. I’m

if he doesn’t agree

“He will.”

you sure

everyone else, eventually he will. Eventually he’ll

think of you

mad at me, but eventually she’ll realize that I’m right, or she’ll leave too. She’s better off without

“You really believe that?”

“Yes.”

your pack hospital, midwife Wanda, your family, your friends. All of them see you as worth so much. Lexi, Norm, and Marcus see you as worth so much. Rowen sees you as everything. Your wolf loves you, and she only wants you. None of the people in your life see themselves as better off without you. Do you want

“Sure. Why not?”

the perfect

“Lexi?”

my office first thing this morning, before I even got here, waiting for

“Me?”

She asked me how she can help you. What she can do to help you heal. How she can be

friends were mostly Robert, Anthony, the Beta’s son Derek, her brother, and Marcus. Females were jealous of her for being friends with all of them so most of them kept away. When Anthony did what he did to her, she pulled herself away from everyone even

but you mean the world to her. In her eyes you

so much more

her she’s not. She adores you.

“What’s that?”

strong, courageous, caring she-wolf, who is a gift from the Moon Goddess. Who will do wonderful things, and who deserves the world. Someone who had a rough start, but never let that stop her from trying to achieve her dream. Who kept a brave face through everything she was

Why did they reject me? Why did they ignore me? Why? What did

true, why had my life been

can only tell you what I know, and I what I have gathered from the things I have read, and heard. Know that I have heard the trail recordings. As well as the recordings from Aurora’s execution, and Dimitri’s recording from his last conversation with Aurora. I have also spoken to Dimitri extensively. Rowen a

as I continued to sob. I felt Lilac head butt my leg, and heard her purr. Leila was whimpering my head. I picked up Lilac, and held her too my chest. She didn’t fight me on it, just licked

had lost. It was in no way right, at all, and he knows that. Braxton was manipulated, badly, and used as a tool. He was young, and impressionable to his mother’s whims, as most pups are. I know you know he regrets his wrongs. Naomi was also very easily manipulated due to her own short- comings. Luna Jane didn’t reject her as a friend in any way, but Naomi was lead astray so many times. Luna Jane had trouble keeping her close. Naomi tends to do what she is told without thinking it through. That

him too. To gain his approval. Unfortunately for Colby he was kind of the odd man out. Aurora even told him that he was just her spare if she needed him. Colby didn’t fit into exactly what Aurora wanted,

had put you in charge of the care of them, and the pack house. He didn’t acknowledge what he saw

would. Gamma Ross distanced himself from everything because he didn’t know what to do. Again not

Aurora had serious mental health problems, that while rare in wolves, do happen. I believe she had started out as just wanting more for herself than what she had as a pup, and upon getting it, it tainted her mental stability in ways that you suffered for. Her feeling justified in her actions against you, and your mother, indicate that. Aurora, if she had not been executed should

care.

them. Aurora’s mental instability was bred into Fiona through constant reminders, and promises, despite being empty. Do I believe Fiona suffers from the same mental instability Aurora does? No. I believe she is the result of that mental instability being used in a way that manipulated another. In Braxton’s case it’s different

him, just something he assumed, and believed. He realized his mistake quickly.

badly. There was never anything wrong

“But….”

hard to believe, and it’s hard to change a line of thinking that has been beaten into you, but it is

do I do? How

Chastity, and a lot of work. It is also going to take a good support system. One your already have. One that wants to be there for you, and help you in everyway they can. It also is going to take you listening to what they’re telling you, and believing them. Not just their

too.”

you

attack, and Lexi called Rowen, what did

Norm put me into one of his sweatshirts, and video called me to talk to me, and calm me down. He stayed on the video call until I fell asleep last night. He shouldn’t have done that though. He had work to do, and responsibilities. He was pulled away from all

He did that because YOU are the

“But I shouldn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because he deserves better.”

you really are inside, not the bruised, battered shell on the outside. He

good for him.”

“But….”

who you are. What those horrible people told you is not who you are. You are so much more than that. Rowen, he sees that, and he will do everything he

you.”

Goddess had to have made

strong, confident, and loyal to get you through what you are. She knew he needed someone to remind him to be humble, kind, and observant. She knew you needed each other so she paired you. She made the right choice. It may take you time to see it, but eventually you will. If you reject him you will regret it

L

“\….

me ask

“OK.”