The Author's POV

"Pathetic, isn't it?"

As I mumbled those words, I turned to face the people in the seats across from me.

My throat tightened as I felt the gazes of the people in the room.

Their gazes...

They felt rather suffocating. Especially when I met the gazes of Ryan and the others that were close to Smallsnake. I felt a deep sense of guilt when I saw the pained expression on their faces.

A part of me felt responsible for this mess.

It wasn't just that. As I spoke, memories of Smallsnake started to resurface inside my mind. Each and every one of them caused me to experience intense anguish.

Time stood at a standstill, and a great sense of wariness washed over me. Enough to give me the impression that my body had completely lost all of its vigor.

'...I look pretty pathetic, don't I?'

I lowered my head and stopped speaking.

I probably looked a far cry from how I usually acted, but I couldn't help it. Never did I expect a loss to impact me so much.

Unlike the other me, I still had emotions, and they weren't something I could just turn off with the flip of a switch.

I wish I could...

...I really wish I could.

I slowly raised my head and opened my mouth to speak. My eyes quietly swept the room in the process.

My gaze halted in a certain area just as I was about to speak.

My body began to tremble. A flood of emotions burst out from deep within my body while my eyes focused on a particular person in the distance.

He...

He looked just like me.

Black hair, blue eyes, and an indifferent look...it would be more appropriate to say that he was me.

He was standing near the rear of the room with shackles around his hands and feet. Everything around me started to vanish at that very moment, leaving only him to fill my field of vision.

Everything around me felt dark.

It seemed as though the world had ended and the two of us were the only people remaining in this world. Breathing and standing got a little more difficult, which intensified the feeling of unease that I felt.

'All of this...'

Blinking once, the world around me cleared up and I found myself inside the chapel again. He was still standing there.

His image continued to haunt me in my mind.

'...All of this is his fault.'

I quietly mumbled to myself.

Everything that was happening to me, and Smallsnake's death. It was all his fault.

I was sure of it.

Smallsnake's death was something he had planned.

At first, it didn't make sense to me, but by this point, I was positive. Smallsnake's death was planned by him. He had planned his demise with the sole purpose of inciting animosity between Jezebeth and I.

sense to me,

that everything was his fault.

He was my curse.

That's why.

my mouth, I

'...Please die.'

***

funeral lasted for

up to the podium

majority of the attendees didn't quite know Smallsnake. They were mostly there to

fact, the number of people that were actually close to him

was the faces

unfold, Kevin

much this individual known as 'Smallsnake' meant to the

to be in

But...

'Please die.'

a glimpse of his words, Kevin found himself unable

and the direction he was looking at, Kevin

he talking about

Why?

did Ren want him to die

understood why. He just didn't want

felt weird to Kevin. In a way, he looked like the bad guy. He was the guy

felt that

his actions made sense

half of it was destroyed as a result of

sense, what Ren was going through was what he deserved to

His actions...

worse than

hate him. In a way, he felt

just how much pain he

same

that wasn't the

'...There's something missing.'

else was bothering

sure about what it was. For now, it was just a feeling, but at

it's time to go

sensing a pull at his arm. After briefly focusing his attention on her, he turned around and swept his gaze around the room. Soon his eyes paused on Ren

a few seconds, Kevin's eyes

"Let's go."

to

"...Not now."

Kevin quietly mumbled.

he repeated in a

"Not now."

***

toward the headquarters right after the

things that needed to

Clank—!

door of the warehouse, the first thing that greeted

would be greeted by lights and Smallsnake's

'You're finally here, Ren.'

'Shut up.'

'Fuck you.'

"Haha."

from my lips when I recalled our