The Author's POV

"Pathetic, isn't it?"

As I mumbled those words, I turned to face the people in the seats across from me.

My throat tightened as I felt the gazes of the people in the room.

Their gazes...

They felt rather suffocating. Especially when I met the gazes of Ryan and the others that were close to Smallsnake. I felt a deep sense of guilt when I saw the pained expression on their faces.

A part of me felt responsible for this mess.

It wasn't just that. As I spoke, memories of Smallsnake started to resurface inside my mind. Each and every one of them caused me to experience intense anguish.

Time stood at a standstill, and a great sense of wariness washed over me. Enough to give me the impression that my body had completely lost all of its vigor.

'...I look pretty pathetic, don't I?'

I lowered my head and stopped speaking.

I probably looked a far cry from how I usually acted, but I couldn't help it. Never did I expect a loss to impact me so much.

Unlike the other me, I still had emotions, and they weren't something I could just turn off with the flip of a switch.

I wish I could...

...I really wish I could.

I slowly raised my head and opened my mouth to speak. My eyes quietly swept the room in the process.

My gaze halted in a certain area just as I was about to speak.

My body began to tremble. A flood of emotions burst out from deep within my body while my eyes focused on a particular person in the distance.

He...

He looked just like me.

Black hair, blue eyes, and an indifferent look...it would be more appropriate to say that he was me.

He was standing near the rear of the room with shackles around his hands and feet. Everything around me started to vanish at that very moment, leaving only him to fill my field of vision.

Everything around me felt dark.

It seemed as though the world had ended and the two of us were the only people remaining in this world. Breathing and standing got a little more difficult, which intensified the feeling of unease that I felt.

'All of this...'

Blinking once, the world around me cleared up and I found myself inside the chapel again. He was still standing there.

His image continued to haunt me in my mind.

'...All of this is his fault.'

I quietly mumbled to myself.

Everything that was happening to me, and Smallsnake's death. It was all his fault.

I was sure of it.

Smallsnake's death was something he had planned.

At first, it didn't make sense to me, but by this point, I was positive. Smallsnake's death was planned by him. He had planned his demise with the sole purpose of inciting animosity between Jezebeth and I.

sense to me,

was his fault. He

He was my curse.

That's why.

my mouth, I quietly

'...Please die.'

***

lasted for

to the podium and

of the attendees didn't quite know Smallsnake. They were mostly there to support those that were

actually close to him didn't number more than ten.

was sadder was the faces of

unfold, Kevin understood

just how much this individual known as 'Smallsnake' meant to

who seemed to be

But...

'Please die.'

words, Kevin found himself unable to continue paying attention to the

words, and the direction

talking about

Why?

Ren want him

why. He just didn't

looked like the bad

that

a way, his actions made sense to

world when half of it was destroyed as a result of Ren's

what Ren was going through was what he

His actions...

were no worse

understood that...yet he couldn't bring himself to hate him. In a way, he felt sympathy

just how much pain he went through, and the reason for his

that he would behave the same way if put in the same situation

wasn't the thing that

'...There's something missing.'

else was bothering

now, it was just a feeling, but at the same time, Kevin knew that there was

time to

toward Emma after sensing a pull at his arm. After briefly focusing his attention on her, he turned around and swept

for a few seconds, Kevin's eyes drooped. Then,

"Let's go."

going to talk

"...Not now."

Kevin quietly mumbled.

repeated in a softer

"Not now."

***

the others back toward the

a lot of things that needed to be

Clank—!

thing that greeted me was darkness. It was

greeted by lights and

'You're finally here, Ren.'

'Shut up.'

'Fuck you.'

"Haha."

laugh escaped from my lips when I