Chapter 52
Luca’s stumbles again as he holds me up with one arm below my ass, the other still around my waist – but I don’t care.
I don’t care at all – don’t care about anything except the taste of his mouth, the feel of his lips pressing against mine again and again. I can only concentrate on the way his tongue feels as he licks me, promising without words all the different ways he wants to taste me, all the different parts of my body he wants to taste –
God, fuck, if we fall to the ground in this damn dream forest, I don’t care
Might be better, honestly, so I could feel the weight of him on me, pressing me inexorably down, into the ground –
But Luca finds his footing, his grip on my thigh moving upwards to tighten at the soft place right at the crease of my ass. He moans again, that hard shudder passing through him as I wrap his hair in my fist and tilt his head backwards an inch, taking control of the kiss, pressing my tongue into his mouth this time.
He shakes his head, panting against me, his eyes flicking open just for a second, hazy with lust. And slowly, deliberately – not knowing at all what makes me do it – I pull back just incrementally to lick the length of his lower lip, wanting to taste him there. The feel of the stubble on his chin against my tongue makes my eyes flutter shut with want.
“God damn it, Ari,” Luca murmurs before sealing his mouth hard to mine, his hand drifting higher on my back, up my neck, his fingers brushing the hair at my nape. I lose myself to him completely, to the feel of his body pressed tight to mine, to his heartbeat my own – pounding in his chest.
–
–
as vivid as
But suddenly his fingers move higher, burying themself in my hair hair that is longer than it should be, for a boy –
And my cap, it falls sideways off my head –
All of my hair tumbles down a moment later, cascading around my shoulders.
Luca’s eyes fly open as I gasp, pulling back just an inch
Chapter 52
But it’s enough.
Enough, as his fingers run once through the length of my hair.
I freeze. Completely freeze like a panicked animal, staring at him.
ོར་རྣམས
I see every second of it as Luca’s eyes go wide, taking in the rose–gold expanse of my hair as it pools around my face.
“Ari…” he whispers, mystified.
name – it breaks
shriek and shake my head, pressing my eyes
dream
–
shrieking again unable to help it, but also desperately hoping that my
desperately can’t let them know how completely I’ve fucked this
I feel capable of controlling myself, covering my face with my hands and staring up at the ceiling of my
This
–
it? All because I was so stupid and weak and couldn’t resist kissing him couldn’t keep myself from absolutely losing control with him, climbing him like a
–
god, what a kiss
kissed boys before, but not like
–
reminisce, I scold myself. Even if it was a shatteringly good, life- changing kiss this isn’t precisely the
–
have thing to do! I have goals!
Chapter 02
happen right now. He’s probably waking up in his own room right now, completely freaked out and baffled about what’s
–
how moody he was this morning when he didn’t even know if the dream state was
all night long, going over all the possible scenarios in my mind. Whether or not Luca actually
did. Of course! He’s not
he? Did he think it was just dream magic?
I mean, is he going to hate me for keeping even more important truths from
how will he actually react to
will he
with Rafe and Jesse, wanting everything out in the open…but then!
Rafe!
hell is he going to do when
I
sick of trying to balance all these secrets, sick of my complete loss of control.
an ounce of it. I don’t know why – I’m completely exhausted, but somehow it just doesn’t. Maybe because I’m terrified of entering the dream state
there, because he’s too mad at
because I put my enrollment in the Academy at risk because I was too weak to resist a
up on the prospect of sleep all together and sit up, pulling my chemistry book closer. I light the little lamp on my tiny bedside table
skin a few hours
my
curtain.
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