Chapter 52

Luca’s stumbles again as he holds me up with one arm below my ass, the other still around my waist – but I don’t care.

I don’t care at all – don’t care about anything except the taste of his mouth, the feel of his lips pressing against mine again and again. I can only concentrate on the way his tongue feels as he licks me, promising without words all the different ways he wants to taste me, all the different parts of my body he wants to taste –

God, fuck, if we fall to the ground in this damn dream forest, I don’t care

Might be better, honestly, so I could feel the weight of him on me, pressing me inexorably down, into the ground –

But Luca finds his footing, his grip on my thigh moving upwards to tighten at the soft place right at the crease of my ass. He moans again, that hard shudder passing through him as I wrap his hair in my fist and tilt his head backwards an inch, taking control of the kiss, pressing my tongue into his mouth this time.

He shakes his head, panting against me, his eyes flicking open just for a second, hazy with lust. And slowly, deliberately – not knowing at all what makes me do it – I pull back just incrementally to lick the length of his lower lip, wanting to taste him there. The feel of the stubble on his chin against my tongue makes my eyes flutter shut with want.

“God damn it, Ari,” Luca murmurs before sealing his mouth hard to mine, his hand drifting higher on my back, up my neck, his fingers brushing the hair at my nape. I lose myself to him completely, to the feel of his body pressed tight to mine, to his heartbeat my own – pounding in his chest.

as vivid as

But suddenly his fingers move higher, burying themself in my hair hair that is longer than it should be, for a boy –

And my cap, it falls sideways off my head –

All of my hair tumbles down a moment later, cascading around my shoulders.

Luca’s eyes fly open as I gasp, pulling back just an inch

Chapter 52

But it’s enough.

Enough, as his fingers run once through the length of my hair.

I freeze. Completely freeze like a panicked animal, staring at him.

ོར་རྣམས

I see every second of it as Luca’s eyes go wide, taking in the rose–gold expanse of my hair as it pools around my face.

“Ari…” he whispers, mystified.

him saying my name – it breaks

my head, pressing my eyes

the dream to end.

my face into my pillow and shrieking again unable to help it, but also desperately hoping that

know how

feel capable of controlling myself, covering my face with my hands and staring up

This

end of everything, couldn’t it? All because I was so stupid and weak and couldn’t resist kissing him couldn’t keep myself from

a kiss

kissed boys before, but not like that

I being to reminisce, I scold myself. Even if it was a shatteringly good, life- changing kiss this isn’t precisely

do! I have

Chapter 02

even if I don’t think that Luca would spill my secret, anything could happen right now. He’s probably waking up in his own room right now, completely freaked out and baffled about what’s going

considering how moody he was this morning

in my mind. Whether or not

he did. Of course! He’s not stupid,

think it

me for keeping even more important truths from him? I can’t blame him for that.

will he actually react

he

keep my secret any more with Rafe and Jesse,

Rafe!

that Jackson is my singular mate! What the hell is he going to

I

again, sick of myself, sick of trying to balance all these secrets, sick of my complete

of it. I don’t know why

won’t be there, because he’s too mad at

don’t sleep because I’ve convinced myself that I don’t deserve sleep, because I put my enrollment in

the prospect of sleep all together and sit up, pulling my chemistry book closer. I light the little lamp on my tiny bedside table and, ensuring that the curtains around my nook are

of my skin a few hours

my

curtain.

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