Jane

“Okay, you can do this. You can do this. You can do this.”I repeat to myself, staring at the phone in my hands with utter trepidation.

The pups are sleeping soundly in their bedroom, and I’m getting ready to sacrifice my dignity in their honor.

I’m not sure how Ethan will respond to my phone call, if he’ll even answer when he sees my number on the screen. I’m half tempted to go find a pay phone and calI from a number he won’t recognize, but I decide to try this first. Taking one last deep breath, I dial and hit the send button, raising the device to my ear.

It seems to ring for an utter eternity, but eventually the line clicks, and Ethan’s deep voice sounds in my ear.

“Jane?”

The familiar sound sends a shiver down my spine. “

Hello Ethan.”

“I thought I told you not to contact me.” Ouch, I know l expected failure, but that seems harsh, even for Ethan.

“Actually you just told me to leave, you didn’t say I couldn’t ever reach out.”I correct him hoarsely. It’s only been four weeks, but it feels like an eternity since we last spoke. Those early days after l left with the pups had passed in a haze that still haunted me, and it feels so surreal just to hear his familiar voice.

“Well I should have.” He growls. “I didn’t realize I had to spell everything out letter by letter. I thought you were smarter than that.”

“Wil you just listen for a moment.” I beg, hating how cruel he’s being.

He pauses for a moment. “Is something wrong?

“Well that depends on how you define wrong.” I snap. “Your pups are absolutely heartbroken without you. They don’t understand why they can’t see you, they’re completely traumatized from the Southern lsles – every other night they’re having nightmares and begging for you instead of me, and yesterday they attempted to run away to the North Pole so they could ask Santa to bring you back to them for Christmas.”

meets me on the other end of the line. I wait impatiently for a response, wondering if

all?

not believing my ears. “Is that all?! Ethan they could have been killed, they stole a horse-drawn sleigh and were taking off into the mountains. They’re desperate to be with you and they don’t understand why you’re suddenly not

you?” He snaps, sounding even harsher than he had a moment

them that you’d abandoned them, do you?” I hiss. “I took the blame for you so they wouldn’t develop a complex, and now they

fault. If you’d done what you were supposed

lungs. I can’t believe him. I can’t believe how badly it hurts to hear him speak to me this way. He wasn’t even this

for my children. “So you don’t even

don’t care that they’ re completely innocent and they worship the

this exactly what you wanted? You were planning to take her from me and cut off contact from the

I burst out, loosing hold of my

He

you made me love you

did you do that? If you cared this little about the children, why did you fight for me the way you did, why did you make me love you if

rumbles. “You owed me for faking your

You deserved to pay.”

maternal rage bubble up inside of me. “It’s one thing to punish me, to break my heart, but it’s another to punish innocent pups. They didn’t do anything wrong – they don’t deserve this,

was give you what you wanted Jane. And yeah, maybe I snuck a lesson in there for you along the way, but this was your dream ending. You made your

against the wall, flinching when it strikes and bounces off again, clattering to the ground. I follow suit, sinking onto the floor

up at my door on my sixteenth Christmas, bearing food and gifts for me and mom. I know how I fell in love with him, he’d been sweet, protective and affecti0nate nothing like the monster he was now. Where did that Ethan go?

bought to match my eyes. It was the

“l picked it out

jewels and finery, and

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