The Silent Alpha (Natalia)

Chapter 20

Chapter 20: First steps

***Jane***

Agnes and I spend the morning with Kota, Rosalie, Rosalie’s baby Emile, and Evan, fighting our own anxiety from our lack of activity.

In all my life, I had never had a moment to rest, to just sit and watch a movie or play games without a care in the world.

Even if there was chance that I completed my chores, my mind and self-hatred would torture me relentlessly.

As a pup, my father put me through rigorous schooling and speech therapies to make me the best Alpha I could be.

Of course, I could never live up to his expectations.

He would make me stand before him once a week to recite the history of our pack or the laws that governed it and the kingdom.

If I faltered in my pronunciation, I would be struck with a whip.

There was never a day that I made it out of a recital without shedding blood.

My mother would weep sorrowfully, begging my father helplessly to have mercy.

She would sometimes be beaten herself for attempting to shield me.

It hurt my soul to fail her so miserably but no matter how hard I concentrated, my tongue would only grow stiffer, and my words would slur like a drunk.

After I was demoted to Omega status, I became a field hand, carrying weapons for the warriors in training or helping maintain the equipment in the hot sun or cold winters.

As I grew older, I learned many things to make myself useful such as plumbing, mechanics, painting and other basic maintenance jobs.

Agnes is no different.

With her hearing gone, she had to make herself useful to earn her meals.

No one wants an extra mouth to feed.

She was beaten relentlessly by other Omegas if she slipped up.

She learned to be quick in the kitchen, never resting for fear she would be cast out or killed by the Omegas.

So, as we sit comfortably on the couch watching Aladdin with Kota, Agnes and I find it hard to rest, wondering if at any moment, this pack’s kindness would run out.

Even Grayson could not find the words to soothe my racing thoughts.

Feeling myself about to break, I get up quietly and search for a pen and paper before approaching Rosalie with a note.

“Are you sure there is nothing we can do to be of service 2” Rosalie reads aloud before raising an eyebrow at me.

“Are you bored?” She asks nervously.

“W-we can go to the park if you like.Kota could stretch his legs and play with some other pups.Let me just get the stroller for Emile,” she says as Evan gets up from his spot to find said stroller.I shake my head at her, writing out my response.

“We just don’t want to be a burden.”She stares at the note before smiling up at me.

“You are our guests, not a burden,” She chuckles.

“Gwen asked for this favor and need,” She smiles.

“Just relax and enjoy yourselves. Take this a small vacation while Gwen finishes up her work.”

Just then we hear the door open, and Natalia appears on her own, a thoughtful look in her eyes.

“You’re back!” Rosalie chirps.

“How was the walk? Did you see all of River Moon?” She asks with a cheerful smile.

Talia smiles sheepishly, her eyes staring at her hands.

“It was …eye opening…” she replies quietly.

“Aurora just had an emergency to deal with.”

There’s a serious tone in her voice and Rosalie appears to understand the true meaning behind her words.

“Well, you’ve come just in time.I think Kota might enjoy some time at the park,”

She gestures to Kota watching the movie on the floor with Rio lying lazily next to him.

“Yeah, mommy!” Kota cries, scrambling to his feet.

“Can we go to the park?”

her consent, Kota bouncing

with the stroller for Rosalie’s pup,

chatters away, pointing out different buildings and explaining their purpose to us to keep

runs ahead of us with Rio reassure her

a picnic for the girls, spreading out a blanket with snacks and

to the playground, several pups gathering around him

friends with ease, and they begin a game of sorts where they run

remain vigilant, and I wish with all my heart that I could help comfort in some way, but I know better than

She is already frightened.

do not need to scare her

picking flowers,

and begins weaving them into crowns, her nimble fingers delicately

with awe over her shoulder, praising her incredible weaving

to Rosalie, placing it on top of

Rosalie asks with a smile as she puts her now sleeping pup

remembering the ‘thank you’

flower crown

having been so focused on her pup and not noticing Agnes getting near

Agnes “Sorry,”

signs with a

her for a few moments before taking the flower crown and squeezing Agnes’

you just scared me, is all,” Talia apologizes, turning

and apologizes

interaction with intrigue before asking a question I had

you so afraid of werewolves?” She asks bluntly, placing her chin in her hand and looking at

you attacked?” Talia shifts uncomfortably on her pillow and shakes

lovely pup…” she says with

“How old is he?”

line, as if holding her tongue, before

four months old…

proudly before her

time talking to us about

want to tell us.But just FYI, you are safe here so you can stop looking at us like we’re going to eat you,” she says

hurt you already

remains silent and watches Kota play with the

to herself for the time being.We remain at the park for lunch and a few hours thereafter until Kota and Rio tire themselves out and lifting his arms up for me to

I can see the hurt in her eyes at being pushed

house can feel a small pain in my heart as we make the small trek in silence and try to think of something I could do to make

Maybe hold her hand…

Grayson suggests.

until I walk alongside her, Kota mumbling with sleepiness

of courage I have, I touch her

nearly stops as I mentally prepare for her to snap at me but instead,

to apologize when she suddenly takes

but I can still

down on her lower lip as a small whimper escapes her throat and she squeezes

onto me for a little while longer

explains, holding her hand as if

she groans, wiping a few stray tears that rolled

face and

tired,” She

Kota to the room,” She instructs as she walks

Kota, but he begs her to let me wash him in her place.Talia looks like she might burst into tears after being rejected by her son

do it?” She

little pain in my heart returns as she looks

he is truly unaware of how much his simple request is hurting her.I accept and Talia hands me his

him stay in there too

to splash you so be firm and have him help you clean up if he makes a mess.He needs to learn

hall, leaving me alone with

tub, grabbing a handful of bubbles

work to wash him so that he can enjoy the bubbles before

splash me many times, but I grab his two little hands and place them

Kota,” I

plug in the tub, the water slowly draining down the hole much to Kota’s dismay glance at the

are alone, I dress the little boy in

mommy is s-sad,” I whisper to him, sliding his socks over

blue

is mommy sad?” He asks, a patient look in his

thi-thi-think s-she miss-misses

“Oh,” he sighs.

I hide my smile and

i-it

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