Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

59. A surprise

It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

1/4

+15 BONUS

question or think too deeply about it, the

my class without saying a single word

a little before I have to go to my next class Luckily, no one stops me in the hallway. I wasn’t really in the mood to

to anyone

freeze up. I was expecting

a groan

as I sit down. Nora’s name flashes.

Ethan I go

accept button instead

she

anything. Just release the breath

my dear, please don’t shut me out. Don’t shut me and your

catching at the

don’t say anything. I couldn’t even if I wanted

fucking word.

to be in your life. I want to be the mother I was

1. to be there for you. I already lost one

another. Losing you again just after finding you would kill me” she pleads,

breaks my heart.

eyes. Damn it. I’ve been so

slowly. Trying to push

time if that’s what you need, but always remember

you in my heart even when I thought

that I’ll always be here

don’t know if I can trust them yet. Only time will

I reply before

just don’t know. What if she’s just

2/4

+15 BONUS

being used. Of being a second choice just like

Rowan.

them. I was just trying to protect

pieces of my heart.

walking towards

I groan under

and she had a way of annoying the hell out

stick her nose in

“With the

would think you’re preggo” she finishes with

but I freeze in my seat. Her words ring in my mind like

through every fiber of

Ava?

right?”

starts coursing through my body. Rushing out of the lounge, I blindly ran through the hallway till I am out of the

of the parking lot.

happening. Please

think back. Try to do the math, but my mind is so jumbled that

that I will probably be pulled for over speeding. I

Carol was wrong.

to the store, I park my car and