Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

62 Noah’s back

Ava

+15 BONUS

I’m cleaning the house. A thorough cleaning just to keep my mind off things. I’m still coming to

terms with the fact that I’m pregnant.

When Rowan rejected the idea of us having another baby. I all but gave up on giving Noah a

sibling. Now I have another baby on the way and I didn’t know how to feel.

My phone rings and I pick it up. Normally I would have refused to pick up, but not today. Pushing

those close to me away wasn’t doing me any good..

“Hi Letty” I murmur while sitting down.

I’ve been so tired of late. I should have known that there was something more to it.

“Oh my God. You picked up. I thought you wouldn’t” she screams through the phone before

sniffing. “I missed hearing your voice. It’s been weeks”

م

“I’m sorry.” I release a breath. “I just didn’t know how to handle everything so I pushed you away”

I’ve never been good at communicating my feelings. I’ve never been good at even acknowledging

them. When I’m stressed or over emotional, I shut down. I try to bury them so that I can function

properly. Pushing my emotions down is usually better than acknowledging them. Now I know

that isn’t healthy at all.

“Are you okay now?”

“Not all the way, but I will be” I assure her.

I don’t know how I plan to do that, but I was going to come out of this stronger.

I still can’t believe that I thought of killing myself and my own child. I may not know how to feel,

but this baby was my blood. Just like Noah is. I plan to be a good mother. I plan to be the best

mother to him or her.

I shake those thoughts away. I don’t want to think of how low I had hit. I don’t want to think of

what I almost did.

“I’m pregnant” I whisper, when she doesn’t say anything after a while.

1/5

+15 BONUS

What? She shrieks in surprise “When did you find out?”

“About a week ago

win Noah, this baby is unexpected and unplanned. That won’t

I always wanted another child. I may not like his or her

Laush

she tells me as the surprises fades

happy about the news. I thought you wouldn’t, given

am. I truly believe that a baby is a blessing, and this baby is who you

you’ve recently been through. This baby is your saving grace. He or

time.” She takes a deep

it. Everyone could see

else has managed to do. Pulling you

she’s said and it’s true. It’s because of Noah and this child that

That I’m willing to get the

Even when I kept pushing you away, you

me” I

makes me

my bestfriend. More like the sister I never had.

you would do the

up after that. Moving away from serious conversations. By the

up. It was an hour or so

nice talking to her. I didn’t realize how much I had missed her. Just how lonely

now. I wasn’t quite there yet, but I was

I am done. I collapse on the sofa, just as I

front door open.

dare enter my house without knocking or ringing the

is answered when I hear

2/5

+15 BONUS

Mommy I am

smile takes over my face and I stand up. I rush out of

through the entry way.

“Noah!”

hug him close to me as tears

had

him all over his

he doesn’t push

How are you here right now?” I ask him as I pull away a little

don’t let him go.

I was just so fucking happy to have him

you needed me. It was supposed to be a surprise, that’s why

we

after he mentions his father that I realize Rowan was

I see an emotion in his eyes, but I just can’t figure out

“Hi” I say softly.

has been by my house everyday just to check up on.

He was so different from the Rowan I was

react to this

he got me a therapist who I began seeing three days ago.

nice, I’m left surprised by his action. It

Ava…how are you today?” he asks with a

I shrug. I was making steps to

pulls at my sleeves and I look at him. “Is it

at me sheepishly while rubbing the back of

I tell him

3/5

has never said anything about wanting a sibling, so I don’t know how he’ll to

his face and he bumps