Chapter 173

Because of You

I don't know how much time passes, but I know it's hours. The sun shifts through the window and I twist to lie on my back.

There's a lump in my throat, everything inside of me struggling to come out.

I sigh, and Zaid looks down at me, his fingers trailing down my arms. "Do you want to talk

about it?"

I swallow. "I'm not pregnant."

He frowns at that, breathing slowly to prepare himself. "Did you want to be?"

I shake my head. "No, I don't think so."

His fingers draw circles on my skin. "It makes you sad?"

I sigh. "She told me I could've been pregnant at one point. Something about my

hormones or something."

He pulls slightly away, looking down at me, eyes searching mine. "Love."

I don't want his pity, I just wanted someone to know, someone to be in the darkness with me. "I don't know how to feel about it." me.

He closes in on me, his hands finding their way under my shirt and around my waist. My stomach twists and I push at his chest. "Zaid, not know, I don't want to-"

"Fuck, Alina. I'm not trying to have sex with you."

I look up at him, new tears streaming down my cheeks. He looks pained, hurt, surprised

that I would assume that.

"I just want to hold you."

My skin breaks out into goosebumps, and I press into him. "I'm sorry, I just-"

I can't even imagine. I'm

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Because of You

my head. "I just, I feel stupid that

"Why?"

didn't want to be. And now I feel

hold on

kind of scared me." The confession slides out of me smoothly.

have nothing to be scared about. I'll be here, always,” he whispers, pressing a

I blink at that.

rising with his next words. "I know it was impossible for the baby to have been mine, but I would have taken care

sob tears

feel like a

I struggle to breathe.

loved her so much.

try to keep my heart in check. "Well, she

so that makes

chuckle, trying to make that part of the conversation much less

give a fuck about that. Fuck Jake. Fuck Aiden,

"Zaid-"

"Because I love you."

second, I think I imagined it. But I didn't.

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Because of You

they melt into the air around

body locks up.

No. No, no, no.

so hard I feel sick. I can't do this.

my head, the walls closing in.

brows furrow, but I don't let him speak. I press my palm to my chest like I can

and they were stolen from me. I can't love someone and lose them

dark and steady, his jaw tense like he's biting back a thousand things he wants to say. Then, in a voice raw with emotion, he murmurs, "I don't need you to say it back. I don't need you to do anything. I just needed you to know

It's rage.

and painful twisting

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